Longbox Junk - Rocketeer Adventures 2

Welcome back to Longbox Junk, the place to find all the comic reviews you never asked for!

Yep.  The world is still crazy.  Even worse. . .no more new comics!

If you'll indulge me a moment of digression, may I humbly suggest that anyone reading this please continue to go to your local comic shop (if they're still open at all) every week and continue to spend the same amount of money you would normally spend for your subscriptions on back issues?  Check out some stuff you let slide in favor of your regular pull.  Maybe grab some trades.  Let's stand together as comic fans and try to support these businesses in dire need.

DIGRESSION OVER. . .

And now to the comics at hand.

I'm a BIG fan of older, pulp-style characters. . .Green Hornet, The Shadow, Zorro, The Spirit, Tarzan, The Lone Ranger. . .so on and so forth. Characters of action and adventure that don't need to rely on super powers to be heroes.  They're pretty much my favorite genre of comic hero.

I discovered The Rocketeer many years ago through the Disney movie and assumed he was a character from that same era of heroes.  After I hunted down some comics and information, I was surprised to learn that the Rocketeer was a product of the 80's!  

Despite The Rocketeer's modern pedigree, I consider him one of the greatest pulp heroes ever created, and that he stands perfectly alongside his fellow heroes as both an individual character AND as a homage to the bygone era they are part of.

Let's take a look at some of his more recently-written adventures in this 4-issue mini from IDW that was the second in a set of two anthology-style series they put out. . .

ROCKETEER ADVENTURES 2

IDW (2012)

ISSUE 1

COVER: Darwyn Cooke

In this first issue we have three stories to consider.  Let's look at each of them on their own. . .

THE GOOD GUYS
Written by: Marc Guggenheim
Art by: Sandy Plunkett

The first thing that caught my eye on this story is how almost perfectly the artist captures not only the look, but the dynamic and energetic feel of Dave Steven's art style! It's a little spooky, in a way, but fantastic. . .

The story itself  is pretty good. The Rocketeer is shot down during a dogfight and the residents of a small town have to decide whether or not to turn him over to the authorities (because he IS a wanted criminal).  It nicely showcases the idea of people in the post-depression NEEDING to believe in someone wanting to be a hero. 

There's not much to it, (basically an extended conversation while The Rocketeer lies unconscious) but I give it a big thumbs-up for the amount of heart the writer manages to cram into such a small space.  

THE DUCKETEER
Written by: Peter David
Art by: Bill Sienkiewicz

This story is based on the notion that if the Rocketeer DID exist, he'd be celebrated in many ways, including being made fun of in Looney Toon-type cartoons before movies. 

This is basically a Daffy Duck/Marvin the Martian cartoon set on paper with Daffy playing the part of the Rocketeer. It's a fun idea and just as wacky and off the hook as those great old cartoons are!

I thought it was pretty funny, but Bill Sienkiewicz's art is a bit of a "love it or hate it" sort of thing because of his very unique (some might say strange) style. So for some, the art might bring this one down a notch or two.

NEXT!

A DREAM OF FLYING
Written by: Stan Sakai
Art by: Stan Sakai

This light and humorous story is about a boy that saves the Rocketeer and is rewarded with a flight with his hero. It has a clever twist at the end where it doesn't say it explicitly, but hints that the boy is a very young Clark Kent (the future Superman) in an unofficial inter-company crossover cameo.   I liked it a lot!  It has heart and shows the Rocketeer as a hero that kids can look up to.

The cartoony, yet detailed art style gives this story a joyful feel and is a perfect match for this tale of a young boy meeting a superhero.  Overall, this whole little story brought a smile to my face.

CONCLUSION

Starting with a fantastic cover by the late, great Darwyn Cooke and going through three stories with a lot of heart and humor, I'd say that this first issue of Rocketeer Adventures 2 is a winner!

The only criticism I would have on this issue is that if you aren't already a fan of The Rocketeer, this is NOT a good introduction. It fully assumes you have knowledge of The Rocketeer and just goes from there.  The stories are still quite enjoyable, it's just that established fans will get more out of them.  

A good start. . .let's see what's next!

ISSUE 2

COVER: Dave Stevens

Like the first issue, there's 3 stories and a pinup here.  Let's check them out!

WORK TO DO
Written by: Tom Taylor
Art by: Colin Wilson

This story takes place on a miserable, rainy, European battlefield during WWII. The art is simply fantastic here. . .it's dark and very detailed. Normally I associate The Rocketeer with brighter hues, but the art fits the tone of the story perfectly here.

The story itself is pretty simple. The Rocketeer going to fight a giant war machine, but delaying long enough to save a single wounded man who needs help. It really paints the picture of The Rocketeer as a true hero. A man who is willing to risk everything for the life of ONE other person. I liked this story a lot! It really pays respect to the character of The Rocketeer.

BETTY'S BIG BREAK

Written by: Paul Dini

Art by: Bill Morrison

This story is played more for laughs, and is based on Cliff Secord's almost insane jealousy over his beautiful amateur actress girlfriend, Betty, as he spies on her during the filming of her first big part and accidentally ends up in the movie too.

The "comedy of errors" escalating through Cliff spying and trying to cover it up just brought a big goofy grin to my face.  This story is a lot of fun!  It's illustrated in a great Golden Age homage style that perfectly matches the light and humorous tone of the story.  

Overall, another winner! Let's see what's next. . .

AUTOGRAPH
Written by: Walt Simonson
Art by: John Paul Leon

Last, we have a pretty simple story about The Rocketeer saving a woman from being kidnapped by thugs and it turning out to be Judy Garland. It's a pretty good story, but what I liked most about it the fantastic artwork! It's sharp, detailed, and heavily-inked. There's one large panel of The Rocketeer flying up from the street that really caught my eye in particular. . .

Overall, a nice action-packed story backed up with some fantastic art gives this issue its third winner in a row!  Special mention goes to the J. Scott Campbell pinup in this issue for the great colors and awesome sense of height. . .

CONCLUSION

The first issue was good, but the second was even better!  From the pulp-tastic Dave Stevens cover in front to the high-flyin' pinup at the back, this issue delivers action, adventure and humor to spare!  Rocketeer Adventures 2 is shaping up to be an extremely solid mini-series.

NEXT!

ISSUE 3

COVER: Darwyn Cooke

We've got three more stories and a pinup. 
Let's do this!

COULDA BEEN. . .
Written by: David Lapham
Art by: Chris Sprouse

After Cliff ruins Betty's night with his jealousy AGAIN, he flies her to the countryside to show her a farmhouse he's been thinking of buying. This leads to reflection from both of them on what their life would be like if they settled down. Cliff becoming a farmer and Betty taking care of the kids. 

The more they think about it, the more they both realize they love each other for what they are and they don't have the right to take each other's dreams away. It's a great little story and digs deep into the relationship between Cliff and Betty. The art is also very nicely done in a sharp, realistic style. It's a different kind of Rocketeer story, but I liked it a lot!

NEXT!

BUTCHY SAVES BETTY
Written by: Kyle Baker
Art by: Kyle Baker

This one is played for laughs, turning the regular "Cliff is jealous of Betty" ongoing Rocketeer joke on its head as Betty interrupts Cliff auditioning a line of pretty girls for a stunt show with a shotgun. Hijinks ensue and Cliff's dog Butch ends up being the hero and saving the day. 

I liked the humor in the "turnabout's fair play" nature of the story, as well as the surprise cameo of The Shadow's alter ego Lamont Cranston! But like the Bill Sienkiewicz story in the first issue, Kyle Baker's art is another unique "Love it or Hate it" style that might leave some readers not liking this one.  Honestly, I'm not on the "Love it" side of the Kyle Baker fence in general. . .

Moving along!

HISTORY LESSON
Written by: Matt Wagner
Art by: Eric Canete

This was a pretty unusual Rocketeer story. It's told mostly with a series of full-page montage scenes until the end, when it's revealed that the narrator is teaching a history lesson about The Rocketeer to students in a far future classroom. It ends with school being dismissed and showing that everyone is flying around with jetpacks. A nice little story with an interesting twist. 

Matt Wagner wrote this story, I would have LOVED to see his art on it as well.  I'm a big fan of Wagner's art and it seems like a missed opportunity.  I'm not saying that the highly-stylized art featured here is BAD, I just think it's a little disappointing that Wagner's talents are only half used here.

CONCLUSION

Unfortunately, of the three issues so far, this one is the weakest.  That's not to say it's bad.  Just compared to the first two issues, this one doesn't have as much going for it.  The stories are still enjoyable little looks into the world of The Rocketeer, they just aren't quite as strong as what came before.  I think the art choices sort of blunted this one for me.  I'm not a fan of Kyle Baker's art and IDW missed an opportunity to showcase Matt Wagner as a writer AND artist.

AND FINALLY. . .

ISSUE 4

COVER: Dave Stevens

And here we are with the big finish!  Starting off on a VERY nice foot with a fantastic poster-worthy cover by the late, great Dave Stevens.  Let's check out the three stories beneath that awesome cover.

WAR HERO
Written by: Louise Simonson
Art by: Walt Simonson

Set in 1942 after the Pearl Harbor attack, Cliff Secord finds himself blocked from joining the military and relegated to making War Bond appearances as The Rocketeer because of his originally stealing his jetpack from the government.  Cliff proves his worth to President Roosevelt by preventing a Nazi suicide bombing attack on the U.S. Capital during one of his shows.

This was a pretty good little story spotlighting the homefront war effort.  It felt realistic in how the government was holding The Rocketeer back from the fighting to raise war bonds.  Honestly, if Disney would have made a second Rocketeer movie, this story would have been a mighty fine starting point for it.  

NEXT!


CLIFF SECORD, WARLORD OF BLARGON
Written by: David Mandel
Art by: J Bone
This story is about The Rocketeer travelling to another world where everything is pretty much the opposite of what he thinks it is. The story is actually pretty funny, with some great moments based on his utter misunderstanding of the aliens and their actions, but the art is sloppy and looks like something from an Indie comic.  It just doesn't look right and takes this otherwise good story down a notch.

AND FINALLY. . .

FAIR GAME
Written by: John Byrne
Art by: John Byrne

I got a sense of deja vu reading this final story. That's because basically, it's the same story as the first one in this issue. In this one, The Rocketeer stops a suicide bomber from killing the King of England during a visit to the World's Fair. 

It seems like a strange choice to put two stories that are so similar in the same issue, but that doesn't make it a bad story at all.  It's well-written and full of the heroic action I want in a Rocketeer story.  John Byrne delivers some reliably good art to go along with his writing as well.  

So even though it's oddly similar to another story in the same issue, this is a pretty good bite-sized chunk of nicely-done Rocketeer action that I can't really find anything to complain about at all.

And to finish things off, a very nice pin-up at the end of this issue by J.K. Snyder III that I NEED as a poster on my comic cave wall!  What a great way to end this series. 

CONCLUSION

And there it is. . .IDW's Rocketeer Adventures 2 four-issue anthology mini-series.

Overall, I found this to be a great read, and would highly suggest that any fan of pulp fiction characters, or those just looking for some good fun in comics, keep your eye out for this one while diving through the back issue boxes. 

It has a few rough spots here and there, but nothing is perfect in the world of comics.  I feel that there was a lot of respect shown for the character.  There's a pretty wide-ranging variety of stories and art. It has a nice, high-quality presentation by IDW, with good thick paper and great covers that are worth the price of admission alone.  

But beyond all of the above, it's just plain FUN!  There's action, there's adventure, there's humor, there's even a little romance.  What more could you ask for in a comic book?  

The only REAL complaint I have about this series (beyond my personal taste in art not being met a few times) is that the reader is pretty much assumed to already be a fan of The Rocketeer and to know all about the character coming in. 

This is probably not the best doorway to becoming a fan of The Rocketeer if you're coming in cold with little or no knowledge of the character.  It's kind of a shame because The Rocketeer IS a great character that more comic fans should get to know about.   It's a good series. . .even great in some parts. . .but it's not a good introduction to The Rocketeer for new readers.

Up next. . .

There's still no news but bad news, so I'm going to try and keep things light here at Longbox Junk for the time being.   I'm not entirely sure exactly what that's going to be.  I think I'll grab some more of my daughter's comics and see if I can find something to make me smile, so I can tell you about it.

Be there or be square!

Longbox Junk - Marvel Age: Spider-Man Team-Up

Welcome back to Longbox Junk, the place to find all the comic reviews you never asked for!

So. . .things have been a little "interesting" lately.  No news but bad news. 

BUT. . .

Here at Longbox Junk, I'm going to try and keep things sort of on the lighter side for now.  With that in mind, when I think of the lighter side of comics, I think of Spider-Man!

On the one hand, I'm not a huge fan of the wise-cracking wall-crawler, but on the other hand, I don't think I have it in me right now to post anything too negative. . .and so we come to the review at hand.   This was actually written and published last year for Comic Book Realm, but not here on this blog. 

So even though this WAS previously-published, it's not really one of my "Rescue Reviews" that I saved from the trash heap of a comic site I used to work for. Consider it more of a recent "Refreshed Review" for people who might not be members of CBR (which IS a great FREE site for organizing your comic collection), if you will.

So let's do it!

ORIGINAL INTRODUCTION:

Yeah, you're seeing it right.  This is an "All Ages" series.  Just bear with me. . .

I know that I'm writing toward an adult audience, but sometimes even adults just want to have a little fun in their comics, right?  I know I do from time to time.  So why not check out what's going on in some of those comics you might otherwise pass over as kiddy fare?

Allow me to explain. . .

When I asked my daughter for some Spider-Man comics to review (I don't have any complete series, just random issues and some one-shots.  I'm not a Spider-Man fan) during my Merry Marvel Mainstream Madness, where I'm taking a closer look at some Mainstream Marvel superheroes that my own collection is sadly lacking in (I'm more of a DC guy), she surprised me by pulling out these comics.

They were pretty worn and tattered (the scans are from the internet because her copies were so beat up), the covers were torn and falling off the staples.  I could tell that she'd read these comics MANY times.  I remembered (from the cover) buying her the second issue (Captain America) when she was about 9 years old, when I used to let her pull a comic from the "All Ages" rack while I picked up my subs.  She'd picked up the rest of the set herself over the years from the back issue bins.

I asked her why these comics?  What did they have going for them for adult readers?  She told me to trust her. . .these stories were just as fun for her now as an adult as they were when she was in grade school.  I still wasn't sold on the idea of reviewing an "All Ages" series in a blog aimed at adult readers based on my daughter's nostalgia.

She gave me "That Look"  The one that tells me I don't know everything and I should listen to someone else now and then.  It's a perfect copy of "That Look" her mom pulls out from time to time.  It can be a pretty potent weapon.  Anyone who's been married a while knows what I'm talking about.

So I took the battered comics and gave them a closer look.  Pretty nice covers.  Got some nice art in this one.  Before I knew it, I was reading one.  It was actually pretty well-written.  Maybe there WAS something here. . .

Let's do this!

MARVEL AGE:

SPIDER-MAN TEAM-UP

MARVEL (2004 - 2005)

ISSUE ONE

THE CHAMELEON STRIKES!

SCRIPT: Todd Dezago

PENCILS: Michael O'Hare

COVER: Randall (Randy) Green

Spider-Man decides that if he's ever going to have a good reputation and maybe even make some money from being a super-hero, he needs to be part of a team.  Making a bid to join with the Fantastic Four, Spidey is snubbed by their secretary.  He decides that breaking Reed Richard's security system will be the perfect way to show the FF that he deserves a chance.

In the meantime, the international spy and master of disguise known as The Chameleon has broken into a secret government laboratory and stolen an experimental formula while disguised as Spider-Man.  Back at the Baxter Building, the Fantastic Four declines Spidey's offer to make them the Fantastic Five despite his admirable effort at breaking into their headquarters, but when Nick Fury interrupts to inform them that Spider-Man has just robbed a secret Lab, the FF brings Spider-Man along to investigate.

Comedy hijinks ensue as the Fantastic Four try to capture The Chameleon while not being able to tell the difference between him and the real Spider-Man.  Finally, The Thing throws them both into the air and tells Johnny Storm to rescue the one that screams loudest.  With this simple plan, The Chameleon is captured and handed over to S.H.I.E.L.D.

The End.

I have to admit that I really enjoyed this story.  I'm not a fan of Spider-Man or The Fantastic Four, but this story is just a light, humorous and FUN little standalone tale.  It's not deep or dramatic.  It's not the best comic book story I've ever read, but I liked it a LOT more than I thought I would!  Who would have thought that a 50 year old guy could get a kick and a smile out of something sold off the kids rack?  

I also really liked the art in this issue.  I had a notion that this would be a sort of "minimum effort" comic, being that it's aimed toward an audience with hardly any standards beyond "YAY! SPIDER-MAN!", but the art has sharp, clean lines, great color, and is exaggerated yet realistic in a way that really catches the eye and elevates the story. 

Overall, I expected minimum effort in this "All Ages" comic and got a brisk, humorous story backed up with some very nice artwork.  Since I'm not a fan of any of the characters, it was a pleasant surprise how much I liked this.  Moving along!

ISSUE TWO

STARS, STRIPES, AND SPIDERS!

SCRIPT: Todd Dezago

PENCILS: Lou Kang

COVER: Randall (Randy) Green

I remember buying this one for my daughter when she was young because of Captain America's "Liefeld Feet" on the cover.  Between that and the weird look on Cap's face, this one is definitely the worst cover of the bunch.  But enough about that. . .

While on a patrol of New York City, Spider-Man comes across Captain America fighting a crowd of A.I.M. foot soldiers.  After assisting Cap, the two heroes discover that the attack was a diversion.  The real target is Gargoyle (a villain who can turn things to stone for 1 hour), who is after a secret formula.

After a long stakeout, where Spidey gets a nice civics lesson from Cap, they finally spot their target and an epic battle ensues.  Gargoyle thinks he's gained the upper hand on the heroes, but they break free, capture Gargoyle for S.H.I.E.L.D. and Cap reveals that the formula was never real. . .it's just something they do every now and then to draw out supervillains.

The End.

The story on this one was quite a bit thinner than that in the first issue, boiling down to two fight scenes and a lengthy discussion on one's duty as an American in between.  When an honest look is taken, it seems the story is actually a bit of a contrived framework to hang the civics discussion on.

That's not to say it's bad.  It's just a bit heavy-handed, depending on your political views.  This issue is definitely skewed toward patriotism.  Personally, when I think of my daughter reading this when she was 10 years old as one of her first comic books, I'm pretty happy with it and I wonder if my buying this comic for her helped to inspire the great person she turned out to be.  I know that's a bit much to hang on a comic book, but I also know that little things DO matter when it comes to kids. . .

Unabashed patriotism as the focus of the story aside, the art in this issue (like the cover) is about the worst in the series.  It's not terrible, but it has a strange psuedo-anime style where background features are highly detailed, but on characters the body proportions aren't consistent from panel to panel, and Cap's face just looks strange.

Overall, this isn't a BAD issue, it's just dominated by a patriotic message that readers will either love or hate, depending on their political point of view. . .I didn't mind it, but it might grind YOUR teeth.  The art is also a bit strange in this one.  Sort of a shame, since Captain America is one of my favorite characters.  He just comes off as very preachy here.

Next issue!

ISSUE THREE

DOWN WITH THE MONSTERS!

SCRIPT: Todd Dezago

PENCILS: Jonboy Meyers

COVER: Randall (Randy) Green

Professor X decides that Kitty Pryde isn't living a proper teenage life, so he "volunteers" her to babysit one of his friends' kids.  In the meantime, Spider-Man pursues a thief into the subway tunnels and discovers a secret entrance leading deeper than it should.

The thief Spidey was chasing is Dreamer, a mutant and Morlock who lives deep beneath the city. When she tries to escape to the upper world, she ends up at the house where Kitty Pryde is reluctantly babysitting.  Dreamer, Kitty, and the kids are all captured and taken back down to the Morlock tunnels, where Spider-Man has already been captured.

Combining their powers, Kitty, Spidey, and Dreamer manage to escape, but they are quickly recaptured by the Morlock leader, Callisto.  Finally, the kids manage to convince Callisto to let them go free, and a valuable lesson in trusting those different than you is learned.

The End.

Similar to the second issue, this issue is also primarily a "Message" issue.  This time around, instead of patriotic duty, we get a lesson in getting to know people you might think are different than you are and finding common ground.  Also like the second issue, the adult reader's enjoyment of this story will very much depend on their personal or political point of view regarding things like immigration and racial equality.   Fortunately, the story itself is much lighter-hearted than that found in the second issue, so to me the "Message" was presented in a better (meaning less preachy and more natural) way.

It also helps that the art in this issue is pretty delightful.  It's nice and sharp, brilliantly-colored and cinematic, with expressive faces that perfectly match the light and humorous tone of the story.

Overall, what we have here is another "Message" story, but it's presented with a light tone and is backed up by some great comic art.  I really enjoyed this issue a lot more than I thought I would.

NEXT!

ISSUE FOUR

OUT OF TIME!

SCRIPT: Todd Dezago

PENCILS: Ron Lim

COVER: Randall (Randy) Green

When the villain Looter accidentally releases the imprisoned trolls of Asgard and their leader, Kryllk The Conqueror, who possesses the power to freeze time and travel instantly between worlds (thanks to a magic crystal), Spider-Man and Thor team up to protect both Earth and Asgard.

After lessons in trash-talking and much troll punching, Spidey and Thor realize that they will have to attack Kryllk at exactly the same time in both worlds in order to defeat him. . .which they do, following an epic battle which saves the two realms and earns both Thor and Spider-Man the praises of Odin.

The End.

There's no "Message" in this issue.  It's pretty much an excuse for an unusual team-up and a comic full of Spider-quips, Asgard-talk, and troll-punching. . .in other words, it's pretty much all action.  But that doesn't make it bad at all.  This is actually a really fun issue, with Spider-man and Thor playing surprisingly well off of each other.  This is definitely the stern and serious old-school "Verily, Thee & Thou" Thor here and that makes him a perfect straight man for Spidey.

The art in this issue fits the sort of Bronze Age throwback nature of this story very well, with lots of action lines and illustrated sound effects during the battles that take up most of the issue.  Backgrounds are sparse, letting the artist focus nicely on the action up front.

Overall, I liked this issue a lot.  It reminded me of the kind of comics I read when I was a Bronze Age kid, and that brought an unexpected smile to my face.  There's not much to it, as far as story goes. It's pretty much one long battle, but it's also just good old-fashioned FUN.

And finally. . .

ISSUE FIVE

CHANGE THE WEATHER

SCRIPT: Todd Dezago

PENCILS: Valentine DeLandro

COVER: Randall (Randy) Green

After Spider-Man saves a girl from bullies, she somehow drains some of his powers and gains them for herself.  As he pursues her, they stumble onto the X-Man Storm trying to save a crashing helicopter and the mysterious girl accidentally drains Storm's powers as well, leaving it up to Spidey to save the day.

Storm and Spider-Man team up to pursue the girl and find out what's going on, and catch up to her as she is tormenting the bullies Spidey rescued her from earlier with Storm's weather powers. . .determined to teach them a lesson in bullying. 

Storm and Spidey manage to talk her down and Storm decides to take her to Professor X.  At the end of it all, the mysterious mutant girl decides to call herself Rogue and a lesson in "With great power comes great responsibility" is learned.

The End.

Finishing up the series, we have another "Message" issue. . .this time out it's "Just because you CAN do something doesn't mean you SHOULD."  In other words, the old tried and true "Great Power/Great Responsibility" lesson that's been in the background of Spider-Man comics from day one.  It's not as preachy as the Captain America issue, but it's not as light as the Kitty Pryde entry. . .it sort of sits comfortably in the middle ground.

What really caught my eye on this issue was the art.  It's dark and detailed.  Not like I would expect in an all ages comic at all.  The art here would easily fit into any mainstream series quite well.  

Overall, this was a good story backed up with some fantastic art.  Once again, my expectations of a minimum effort aimed at an audience with low standards was proven wrong and I found myself liking this story a lot more than I ever thought I would.  Nicely done!

CONCLUSION

I stepped outside of my box in several ways for this series (really more like 5 one-shots).  I'm not really a fan of any of the characters in any of these stories except for Captain America.  I'm not really a fan of team-ups in general.  And then there's the "All Ages" rating.  Three strikes against it before I even opened up the first issue.

THAT SAID. . .

I'm surprised to say that I REALLY liked this series!  Sure, it had some rough spots. . .mostly in that 3 out of the 5 issues fly the All Ages flag high by being "Message" stories. . .but really only one was overbearing (Captain America at his patriotic preachiest).  But lessons for younger readers aside, I generally found this series to be well-written, nicely illustrated (except for the Captain America issue, and even that wasn't ALL bad), and just plain FUN!

Fun.  Now there's a word you don't see in Longbox Junk often.  These comics are fun to read!  My sour old man expectations of minimum effort put into kiddie rack crap was replaced with a goofy grin starting with the first issue.  The quality varies a bit from issue to issue and not all of them are as fun as the rest, but generally-speaking I'm glad my daughter threw these comics my direction.

All in all, I'd say to give these comics a shot if you run across them in the bargain bin.  They aren't the best comics in the world, but for an hour or so, I definitely felt a few years younger reading them. 

Up Next. . .

I'm not sure, but I'm keeping it on the light side of things.  I'll get back to gritting my teeth through some bad comics soon enough, but for now I think we can all use a bit of a break from excessive negativity.

Be there or be square!

Longbox Junk - The Six Million Dollar Man: Fall of Man

Welcome back to Longbox Junk, the place to find all the comic reviews you never asked for!

"Steve Austin, astronaut. A man barely alive."

"We can rebuild him. We have the technology.

We can make him better than he was.

Better. . .stronger. . .faster."

As a child of the 70's I was a big fan of all things Bionic Man (Yeah, yeah. . .I know the title of the show was "The Six Million Dollar Man", but on the playground it was always The Bionic Man). Thinking back on it, I truly believe he was the ultimate 70's superhero. . .a creation of science with the soul of a man. 

Science today is taken for granted. I don't mean to make myself sound old, but when I was a kid in the 70's, Astronauts were still the great American Hero. The moon landings were still fresh in the collective memory. The world was on the edge of major change and advances in technology.

A modern Bionic Man is just one high tech thing among many. But in the 70's Steve Austin wasn't just some T.V. character to me and my friends. . .he was OUR hero for OUR time. A scientific superhero that we could believe was possible in a way that we never really could with someone like Superman.

Steve Austin didn't wear tights, but he always did what he thought was right, even if it meant going against the orders of his superiors. In MY book, that makes him just as much a superhero as ANY cape-wearin' crimefighter and I'll argue that point all day long.

So did this fairly recent Dynamite Six Million Dollar Man mini hold up to my fond memory of that uniquely 70's superhero? Well. . .yes and no. Read on!

THE SIX MILLION DOLLAR MAN: 

FALL OF MAN 

Dynamite (2016)

WRITER: Van Jensen

ART: Ron Salas

COVERS: Ron Salas

ISSUE ONE

CURSED IS THE GROUND

I really like that this story takes place right where it should. . .the late 1970's. A lot of times, writers will try to move characters forward into modern times, but there are certain characters who need to stay put. Lone Ranger and Zorro need to be in the 1800's. The Shadow is best in the 1930's. Green Hornet in the 1940-50's. The Bionic man is best in the 1970's as a high tech anomaly in a world on the edge of becoming high tech.

Really, the fact that Steve Austin IS an unexplained anomaly is the point of this story so far. Nobody really knows WHY out of all the subjects for the top secret project that made him the Bionic Man he is the only one that was successful.

When Austin finds out just HOW many others died during the project, he goes rogue to try and keep himself away from the government, who see him as their property and the key to building an army of bionic men like him.

This first issue is a great setup to what looks like it will be an interesting story.

BUT. . .

The art is barely functional and is pretty stiff in some places. The artist doesn't really capture the likeness of Lee Majors at all. It might be a licensing thing, but it's still a bit disappointing.

And then there's the ending cliffhanger. . .Steve Austin attacked by ninjas out of nowhere and saved by a billionaire with. . .LASER EYES! With such a great start, I was disappointed with the silliness of the ending.

That's a LOT of ninjas!

All in all, despite the clunky art and the silly cliffhanger ending, I liked this first issue. I just hope the ninjas and laser eyes don't signal a quick swerve off the rails. . .

NEXT!

ISSUE TWO

MAMA RUSSIA

Awwwww. . .no.

Second issue in and we're going off the rails. 

Steve Austin is offered a chance to become fully human again, but the catch is that he has to go into Soviet Germany and retrieve a Maguffin.

The whole issue is pretty much a long fight scene between Austin, clones and a giant lobster monster created in a mad scientist's laboratory. After a great first issue setup. Mutant Lobster Monsters?

Please.

No.

Putting aside the mad scientist's cloned monstrosities for a moment, the thing that made me roll my eyes in this issue is how random people keep mistaking Steve Austin for David Hasselhoff and making a big deal of it.

Of course, this plays off on the old meme that Hasselhoff is a huge star in Germany. But that particular meme is from the 90's, not the 70's. Hasselhoff wasn't even famous ANYWHERE until the 80's. Every time someone yells "It's The Hoff!", it clunks like a broken gear.

From out of place memes to cloned lobster monsters, this was not a good issue at all. Steve Austin deserves better than this. I deserve better than this. The world deserves better than this.

NEXT!

ISSUE THREE

THE TRAIN

I really liked the whole art direction on this one! The issue is pretty much all a running battle on top of and inside of a speeding train. The artist draws cutaway panels showing the simultaneous action above and below as a fluid, moving stream of action. This is presented through the whole comic as double-page spreads.

It's a really great idea, but the artist isn't really skilled enough to completely pull it off. In the hands of a better artist, it would be amazing. Still, credit where credit is due for at least TRYING to elevate things a bit.

And then the good stops when the giant lobster monster re-appears with the mad scientist riding on its back shooting a machine gun and shouting "Death to Capitalism!" Please. . .just stop. This isn't what I want in a Six Million Dollar Man story.

All in all, credit due for an interesting storytelling device with the art, but there's not much more to like about this issue. Moving along. . .

ISSUE FOUR

ABORT, RETRY, FAIL?

This issue was half and half good and bad. The good starts with a VERY nice cover!

Now that the lobster monster and Hasselhoffing shenanigans in Soviet Germany are done, the writer turns his attention toward the government conspiracy (introduced in the first issue) to use Steve Austin as the key to creating an army of thinking bionic men.

It turns out that Austin's new billionaire "friend" who has been "hiding" him from the government is ACTUALLY in league with the government to gain his confidence in order to find out what makes him tick. The plotting and conspiracy moves at the beginning are actually pretty good.

UNTIL. . .

We find out the woman Austin is falling in love with is a robot. And that a robot has infiltrated the O.S.I. (the organization that Austin works for). EVERYONE TURNS OUT TO BE A FRIGGIN' ROBOT! Okay, not EVERYONE, but there's quite a bit of ridiculous robotic revelation in this issue.

That's LOT of Robots!

Turns out the government has plenty of robots on hand, but they want thinking bionic men instead. Their only functioning Bionic Man isn't cooperating, so the government finally send out the 'bots to capture Steve Austin so they can take him apart the hard way.

All in all, it starts out nicely with conspiracy and politics, and ends up with a whole lot of robot punching. Way too much robot punching.

AND FINALLY. . .

ISSUE FIVE

AUTOPSY

And now, the big finish! Things start off on a good foot with another great cover.

Inside, it's pretty much all out action as Austin escapes from captivity, friends become enemies, enemies become friends, lots of robots are punched, Steve Austin chooses to take control of his own destiny, and things explode!

All in all, this story is nicely wrapped up in this issue, with Austin and O.S.I. both coming to realize that man is what makes the machine, NOT the other way around. . .that the secret of the Bionic Man is that Steve Austin himself is a hero and always will be. It's not something that can ever be duplicated in a laboratory or mass-produced.

A very nice conclusion to a story that's been pretty disappointing. I'm glad that series FINALLY delivered on the idea of Steve Austin being the hero I remember him to be. Too bad it had to come in the last issue.

CONCLUSION

Overall, despite the borderline bad art and some eye-rolling story beats (Lobster Monsters, Hasselhoffing, Almost everyone turning out to be a robot, etc. . .) I enjoyed this mini. It's far from the best comic story I've ever read, but it had enough decent moments to keep it from being completely bad.

BUT. . .that enjoyment was based on my existing love for this character.

I'm not sure I would heartily suggest it to anybody who wasn't alive in the 70's or isn't already a big Bionic Man fan. This is a pretty bad introduction to the character for new readers.

I think that (like I said above), Steve Austin is a man of his own time. Today, he's just another high tech hero among many, and to tell the truth, this mini wasn't impressive enough to make him stand out of the crowd like he did during the 70's.

I don't think this series did the character justice at all. It was okay, and there were a few moments where it became "Pretty Good", but it never really elevated itself beyond that. The art was pretty bad through the whole thing and the story never completely came together. This is another fine example of something that needed a stronger creative team.

As a fan of The Six Million Dollar Man, I'm sad to say that this was pretty disappointing, but still worth a read. If you're not a fan already, you'll probably be better off skipping it entirely.

Up Next. . .

With all the bad news in the world today, how about we lighten things up just a bit with some Spider-Man? Join me as I take a look at Marvel's five issue " Marvel Age: Spider-Man Team-Up" series.

It's everyone's favorite wall-crawler teaming up with The Fantastic Four, Kitty Pryde, Captain America, Rogue, Storm, and Thor! SPOILER ALERT: It's good old-fashioned four color FUN!

Be there or be square!

Longbox Junk - World's Finest

Welcome back to Longbox Junk, the place to find all the comic reviews you never asked for!

The original "World's Finest" was a long-running out of continuity team-up book that starred the whole roster of DC heroes, but was basically a Batman/Superman series.

 The 2009 World's Finest four-issue mini series at hand is also a team-up book but it's definitely NOT out of continuity. It was written at a time when DC was doing a lot of shaking up of their character status quo and as a reader, you are pretty much expected to be familiar with all the changes going on.

This doesn't bode well for anyone giving it a read eleven years later.  But I'm not gonna let a little thing like continuity abandoned by the publisher not once, but TWICE over the course of a decade stop me from giving this a fair shake.

The most important things for a reader not steeped in past DC continuity to know this far down the road in order to understand what's going on here is: Almost everyone thought Batman was dead, Superman had left Earth, and Kryptonians in general were considered enemies of humankind.  The DC B-List character roster were doing their best to step up and fill the shoes of Earth's (absent) greatest heroes. 

Ready? Let's do this!

WORLD'S FINEST

DC (2009)

ISSUE 1

NIGHTWING & RED ROBIN

SCRIPTS: Sterling Gates

PENCILS: Julian Lopez

COVER: Phil Noto

Right out of the gate I'm staring at the cover and wondering why the youthful Tim Drake looks like a grizzled forty year old guy.  Generally, I like Phil Noto's art, but this is just questionable.

ANYWAY. . .

This first issue teams up Red Robin (Tim Drake, who is searching the world for clues as to where Batman REALLY is) and Nightwing (No, not THAT one. A Kryptonian that Superman had adopted as a son in the bottle city of Kandor). The issue does a pretty good job at explaining who is who, and thank God for that. I didn't have to hit the internet for a refresher on decade old continuity beats.

Unfortunately, the story seems pretty weak so far. The villain is a B-lister (Toyman) and the teamup seems forced. The art is pretty good.  Nothing spectacular, but there's some really nice moments scattered through the issue.  

All in all, the good art doesn't save the story from a weak setup and total immersion in (then current) continuity.  I'm thinking that this COULD have been a lot better in the hands of another writer.  The ideas are there, but the execution just isn't.  Not a great start.

NEXT!

ISSUE 2

GUARDIAN & ROBIN

SCRIPTS: Sterling Gates

PENCILS: Ramon Bachs

COVER: Phil Noto

And another pretty bad cover by the usually-reliable Phil Noto.
This one is just. . .strange. 

It's definitely not the sort of cover that makes me want to buy a comic book.

MOVING ALONG. . .

*Sigh* 

Just two issues in and we're already taking a swerve off the rails with a final page reveal of. . .a giant robot that's half Superman and half Batman in appearance. WHY do comic books love making superheroes punch giant robots?  It's just a really weak "Go-To" story element that needs to go away.

This issue teams up the Damian Wayne version of Robin with The Guardian. I don't know much about The Guardian, but if I had to judge from this issue alone, I don't want to learn more. He is easily one of the lamest superheroes I've seen in a while.

Once again, the book does a pretty good job of explaining who is who, so there's that. . .

Unfortunately, the art takes a turn for the worse (each issue of this mini features a different artist) from "pretty good" to "average and borderline bad in places".  There are moments where you can see a bit more effort (like the giant robot reveal above), but overall this issue's art isn't anything to get excited about.

SO. . .

What we have here just two issues into this thing is a forced team up via a cliche "Heroes fight until they finally figure out they're on the same side" vehicle, a weak overarching story, an extremely lame superhero, average art, and the good old giant robot.

I don't like where this is heading.

NEXT!

ISSUE 3

SUPERGIRL & BATGIRL

SCRIPTS: Sterling Gates

PENCILS: Jamal Igle

COVER: Phil Noto

FINALLY! Phil Noto gives us a great cover.  Very nicely done and worthy of a turn in my rotating comic cover display on my office wall at work.

In this issue we have a team up between Supergirl and the Stephanie Brown version of Batgirl, with Oracle, Catwoman, Dick Grayson Batman, Damian Wayne Robin, and the 2009  "Just another Kryptonian Soldier" version of Superman making cameos.

 I guess it's pretty cool to have an issue packed with so many DC characters, but the execution is still so very weak.  This MIGHT have been great in the hands of a stronger writer.  I WANT this to be great.  But it's not.

Most of the issue is spent fighting against Toyman's tiny little robots before he decides it's time to power up the giant Kryptonite-powered Batman/Superman robot.  All those great characters and cameos are pretty much wasted on a comic cliche robot punch party.  What a shame.

God, I hate comic stories that are nothing but robot punching.

I don't even want to read the final issue.

But I ain't a quitter, son.

LET'S DO IT!

ISSUE 4

SUPERMAN & BATMAN

SCRIPTS: Sterling Cates

PENCILS: Phil Noto

COVER: Phil Noto

This one has a pretty good cover done in Noto's more familiar style.  Unfortunately, it's a bit deceptive because even though the actual Superman IS in this issue, he isn't wearing his "Big Blue Boy Scout" suit.  If I bought this issue off the stand in 2009 thinking that Superman was back for reals based on this cover, I'd feel more than a bit shafted (It's "I'm just another Kryptonian soldier now" Superman inside).

THAT ASIDE. . .

I was really surprised to find that I actually liked this last issue after the serious swerve off the rails the previous two took.

Yeah. . .there's a giant Kryptonite-powered Superman/Batman robot on the loose that has to be punched, but in between the robot punching there are some really nice character moments between Dick Grayson Batman and "Just another Kryptonian Soldier" Superman that address the new (in 2009) status quo and DC's "Legacy Heroes" tradition.

Once the writer got past the robot punching, the story here has heart.  It takes a look at WHY we love these characters and miss them when they aren't around.  The writer actually stepped up at last and gave me some meat on this bony story.  It's a real shame that this only comes out in the final issue.

The stellar art by Noto in this issue helped improve things as well, with a VERY nice opening page. He actually makes giant robot punching look pretty good in the rest of the issue as well.

Too bad the ending was weakened by a cliffhanger that I'm sure tied into then current continuity, but didn't do any favors to this mini as a standalone story being read eleven years later.

All in all, this was definitely the best issue of the series, despite a lot of giant robot punching. And when I say it was the best issue, I mean it elevated itself above "Utterly average and borderline bad" to the exalted ranks of "Pretty Good".

CONCLUSION

Overall, this World's Finest mini-series is more like "World's Average".

The story is pretty weak, the villains were second rate, the art swerves from pretty good to borderline bad, the team ups were forced using a dusty assortment of comic book cliches, and the whole thing revolves around the reader's knowledge of (then) current continuity instead of standing on its own.

And then there's the giant Kryptonite-powered Batman/Superman robot.  

I wouldn't really suggest this mini to anyone except those who have an interest in Pre-New 52 characters and continuity.  I'll admit that seeing characters like Oracle, Stephanie Brown Batgirl, and Red Robin again was a bit of a blast from the past, and I enjoyed that for what it was, but it just wasn't enough to save this series.

Up next. . .

"Steve Austin, astronaut.  A man barely alive."

"We can rebuild him.  We have the technology.
We can make him better than he was.
Better. . .stronger. . .faster."

If you're a child of the 70's like me, you KNOW what I'm talking about. . .

The Six Million Dollar Man!

Join me in taking a look at Dynamite's Six Million Dollar Man: Fall of Man mini-series.

Be there or be square!