Longbox Junk - Glory #1

Welcome to Longbox Junk, the blog absolutely STUFFED with comic reviews nobody asked me to write!

In case you haven't noticed by now, I spend a LOT of time digging through bargain bins.  I've noticed over the years that there are certain "staples" that no decent dollar box is ever missing. . .Image Comics is probably the biggest one of those staples.

If you are in a comic shop. . .it doesn't matter where that comic shop is. . .and you are going through a box of cheap comics, I GUARANTEE you're going to be finding some Image Comics.  I'd put money down on that guarantee and not worry one bit about losing it.

What I'm saying is that when it comes to Longbox Junk, Image is the King of The Hill. 

Now, don't get me wrong.  Since their founding in the 90s, Image has matured into the publisher you go to when you get tired of the same old superhero stories, but back in the beginning it was ALL superhero ALL the time. 

Image wanted to be Marvel SO badly, that when you read Image comics today, it's almost pathetic.  Their trying to grab Marvel's fans is so obvious and so blatant that I'm surprised they didn't get sued over their barely-disguised versions of established Marvel characters.

THAT SAID. . .

While Marvel WAS Image's biggest "inspiration", DC was definitely on their radar as well.  Image didn't have nearly the amount of DC "inspired" characters as they did Marvel, but they were there.  Supreme for Superman, ShadowHawk for Batman, and Glory for Wonder Woman (among others).

Which brings us to the comic at hand! 

Glory is a character created by Rob Liefeld in 1993.  She's the result of a union between an Amazon Queen and a Demon Lord, raised by her mother among the Amazons and becoming their greatest warrior.  She struggled with her dual nature and eventually left her home among the Amazons to live in the world of Man. . .first appearing as a heroine during World War II (Thanks, Wikipedia!).

See what I mean about Image's early characters being heavily "inspired" by established characters?  How they managed to avoid a pile of lawsuits is a mystery to me.  Obviously, from the description above, Glory is a blatant copy of Wonder Woman.

BUT. . .

I'm willing to give ANY comic a fair chance, and that's what I'm gonna do here.  So let's take a closer look at Image's version of Wonder Woman and see if there's anything to like, shall we?

WE SHALL!

GLORY #1

IMAGE (1995)

WHO WROTE THE BOOK OF LOVE?

SCRIPT: Jo Duffy

PENCILS: Mike Deodato

INKS: Mike Deodato

COVER: Mike Deodato

THE COVER:

You want 90s? You GOT 90s with this cover!  I don't even know where to start.  This cover has a LOT going on. Unfortunately, not much of it's good.  I DO like the black frame and the colors, but that's about it.  It's not the worst example of 90s art that I've seen, but it certainly hasn't aged well. You can definitely see what Image was trying to sell here. Let's just say I'm glad we've (mostly) moved along from this sort of thing.  

Let's get inside!

THE STORY:

We begin our tale in the middle of an ongoing conversation.  Our titular hero, Gloriana Demeter (AKA Glory) is at a meeting with the board of Factor Cosmetics.  Mr. Factors himself is trying to sell Glory on the prospect of being the spokeswoman for Factor's newest line of cosmetics. . .

Unfortunately for Mr. Factor, Glory doesn't seem to be interested in his somewhat offensive hard-sell technique.  She tells him in no uncertain terms that he has nothing new to offer her, and that pleasing normal men isn't interesting to her any longer after having been with the superhuman Supreme.  In the process, we get a brief bit of exposition on her decades-long superhero career during and after WWII. . .

Factors counters by telling her that the. . .ahem. . .Glory Days are long past and that she's no long a household name.  In the meantime, outside the window, Glory's friend and Brigade teammate Leonard Swann (AKA Vandal) kills a strange bird. . .

We discover that the bird was a spy sent by Glory's father, the demonic Lord Silverfall, who is watching Glory from his hellish castle in the underworld. . .

Back in the Factor Cosmetic boardroom, Glory refuses Mr. Factor's offer.  Factor does NOT take this well and begins to berate and harass Glory. . .perhaps unwise, when the object of Factor's attempted bullying is a superpowered half demon.  A fight breaks out and Factor's bodyguard pulls a gun!

Glory punches the bodyguard through the window, where he is saved from falling to his death by another one of her Brigade teammates waiting for her below, Flanders Edison (AKA Rumble).

Glory leaves the meeting and joins her friends below. She tells them what happened, and they think she let them off too easily.  The heroes leave the scene after Rumble changes back to normal size.  

He tries to tell the other two about an antique arcane book he's discovered, but Glory and Vandal ignore him as Vandal tells Glory about the spy from Lord Silverfall he found. . .

As Rumble and Vandal leave to go get some food, Glory is ambushed by some sort of demonic creature!

The End. . .To Be Continued!

THE REVIEW:

Allright.  There it is.  The first issue of Image's Glory.  Let's break it on down!

*Sigh* There's not much here to like, to be honest.  

There's no real beginning to this story, as we're dropped right into the middle of a conversation.  There's no real ending, with the issue just stopping at a cliffhanger surprise attack.  What's in the middle is really very short and doesn't shed much light on who Glory is, what she's about, and why we should keep wanting to read about her.

I've laid out my personal expectations for the first issue of a comic series quite a few times already here at Longbox Junk, but to sketch them out again, I expect a first issue to introduce characters and their situations in a new reader-friendly way and to leave me wanting more.  It's a pretty low bar.

Unfortunately, Glory #1 fails at both of these simple things.  There's a LITTLE bit of information about Glory here, but not nearly enough to qualify as a decent introduction to a new reader.  I had to go to Wikipedia to learn who the demonic guy watching her was (Her demon father, Lord Silverfall) and to learn that Glory is half Amazon and Half Demon.  Her teammates just appear out of nowhere and I had to hit Wikipedia to find out who THEY were as well. 

 I feel sorry for new readers in 1995 who didn't have Wikipedia, because this is a pretty lousy introduction.  It's obvious from the letters page to see that Image was fully expecting readers to go out and buy Brigade, Supreme, Youngblood, and several others in order to get the big picture.  What we have here is just a fragment.

As far as leaving me wanting more, Glory #1 fails even harder than it did in giving me a decent introduction to a new character.  After reading this and realizing I would have to dig into several other series to find out what's going on, I lost interest in ever wanting to know more about Glory.  

There's a definite stench of money grab wafting out of this comic.  From the cheesecake cover to the letter page listing out the *checks* TEN ISSUES from EIGHT different series you need to read to fill in the story past the fragment here, this whole thing reeks of a publisher trying to scrape every dollar they can from their fans.

CONCLUSION

Style over substance is good way to sum up this comic.  It's basically a cheesecake cover hook baiting Image fans into buying the first issue of a series that doesn't even introduce the main character very well and gives them no incentive to read more without shelling out ten times the cash they've already spent on this issue.  

If nothing else, Glory #1 serves as a perfect example of the desperation in Image's early sales tactics.  Other than that interesting bit of insight into the strange days of 90s comics, there's really nothing else I can recommend about this beyond a few nice panels of art (like the double page spread of Silverfall's castle I scanned above).  Maybe it gets better as it goes on, but this first issue leaves me completely uninterested in finding out if it does. Glory is a bargain bin mainstay, and now I see why.

Up Next. . .

He's a guy you do NOT want to see when he's angry. 

Yeah, you know who I'm talking about. It's the one and only INCREDIBLE HULK!

I recently got my hands on a half dozen of Marvel's "The Hulk" magazines from the 1970s. What say we take a look inside one and see what's going on?  Let's do it!

Be there or be square.

Longbox Junk - Blindside

Welcome to Longbox Junk! It's the blog with more comic reviews you never asked for than you could ever ask for! No need to thank me. . .it's just what I DO!

I've mentioned it before, but I have sort of a soft spot in my comic-lovin' heart for early Image comics.  These days, Image has carved out a great spot for themselves as the company you go to when you get tired of superhero stories, but in their early days they were ALL superhero ALL the time.  And it was in the most obviously desperate "We wanna be the new Marvel!" way possible.

To accomplish their goal, Image flooded the market with a LOT of new superhero comics.  There was a point in time in the 90s that they were pretty much throwing anything they could at the wall to see what would stick.  That point in time was around 1996. . .which brings us to the comic at hand!

Blindside was one of the comics that did NOT stick.  It's one of several projects from Image that didn't last more than one issue, even though there were more planned and advertised.  So let's take a look at this unloved and abandoned relic of the 90s and see if there's something here to like, shall we?  WE SHALL!

BLINDSIDE #1

Image Comics (1996)

COVER:  Marat Mychaels & Al Vey

I Spy With My Little Eye

SCRIPT: Marat Mychaels & Robert Loren Fleming

PENCILS: Marat Mychaels & Leo Jimenez, with Chuck Drost

INKS: Al Vey & Sean Parsons

THE COVER:

Not bad, in that special 90s-Tastic way.  I'm always a bit of a sucker for monochromatic backgrounds on a comic cover, and the stark white of this one sets of the character portrait very nicely.  I like the bold colors a lot as well.  The logo looks like it was created with the '96 version of Windows Paint, though.  Not good.

Blindside himself is SO 90s that the 90s are like "Can you tone it down a bit?"  Between the gritted teeth, bulging muscles, the McFarlane-Lite twisted pose and tangled rope, and the "It's a mask. . .but with HAIR!", this cover IS the 90s.  Still, not too bad.  Let's get inside!

THE STORY:

We begin our tale alongside Richard Kemp. . .a highly-trained top agent of the ultra-secret "Orion Sector" intelligence agency.  He's observing a meeting between Criminal Mastermind Ronald Quinn and a scientist who has developed some sort of device built into a helmet.  

Quinn demands that the device be immediately tested on one of his henchmen, despite the Professor's insisting that it isn't ready. . .

As the device seemingly malfunctions, killing Quinn's henchman, Richard is discovered in his hiding place. . .

Using the man who found him as a human shield, Richard jumps down from his perch and leaps into action, easily dispatching Quinn's thugs. . .but as he fights, Quinn himself takes the agent by surprise from behind, knocking him out!

When Richard regains consciousness, he finds himself Quinn's prisoner!  He witnesses Quinn kill the Professor for delivering a faulty device.  Then Quinn puts the helmet on Richard and turns it on. . .promising the captive agent an agonizing death!

But Richard doesn't die!  Instead, he wakes up handcuffed to a hospital bed and surrounded by Orion Sector agents, including his Uncle Bud. . .who had taken Richard in after his father's death and been his Orion Sector mentor for many years.

 After reporting what happened during the stakeout, Richard is shocked to learn that Quinn has an alibi, there was no helmet found, and no other dead bodies. . .just the Professor, killed with Richard's gun and no other prints to be found.

He's been set up!

After the Orion Sector agents leave, Richard ponders his situation.  He knows too much to stand trial.  He'll just. . .disappear.  He's devoted his life to Orion Sector, as did his father before him.  Richard sees himself as a patriot and doesn't want to go down without a fight.

As he agonizes about how to clear himself of the false murder charge, Richard suddenly has some sort of painful mental attack.  As the pain fades, Richard realizes that he can see through the walls!  There are three men with guns outside his room, and they're coming in after him!

As the armed men burst into the room, Richard is ready for them!  During the fight, he learns that they are Orion Sector agents, sent to terminate him!  

Not believing that his Uncle Bud could ever stand by something like this, Richard makes his escape by smashing through the hospital window, declaring that he would take Orion Sector down as he falls, still firing at the men who attacked him. . .

But somehow, the fall doesn't kill him!  Richard is amazed to find himself unharmed. . .but there's more Orion Sector men below, and he's still under fire.  Richard makes a desperate escape through the hospital parking lot, finally managing to steal a motorcycle. . .

Knowing that he didn't have a chance of eluding his highly-trained pursuers, Richard decides to make use of his own training and attack instead of running, managing to destroy a truck full of Orion Sector agents with a single shot, using his new powers to guide the bullet to his target!

But there's more agents where they came from!  Richard goes into a kind of combat frenzy, attacking the remaining pursuing agents and stealing their car. . .

After wrecking the car, Richard manages to escape on foot.  He makes a gritty promise to destroy Orion Sector and anyone behind his betrayal. And from the looks of it, he means it!

To be continued. . .wait. . .never mind.  There was never a second issue.  The End, I guess?

THE REVIEW:

Okay then. . .there it is. The one and only issue of Blindside.  Let's break it on down!

I really hate to say this, but there's not much to like here.  I can see why the plug got pulled on Blindside so quickly.  There's some decent art here and there, but overall, this comic is so utterly average that I had to read it three times in order to write this review because I kept forgetting the details of the story.  And when you've got such a simple story as the one here, that ain't a good thing.

The framework of the story itself is pretty solid. . .secret agent on the run after being framed for murder and discovering that he's somehow gained some unusual powers.  The powers add a little curve on a well-worn action hero story path, but not enough of a curve to make me want to read more.

The dialogue is pretty stilted and full of exposition.  You can really tell that the writer is actually more of an artist when you read this.  It's definitely a bit of a slog reading this comic. . .and like I mentioned above, it's so utterly average that you forget it almost as soon as you're done reading.

On the art side of things, 90s nostalgia pins this one JUST on the good side of bad.  There are actually some really interesting moments to be found (The stark white background page of Blindside attacking multiple gunmen I scanned above is definitely a standout), but there's just not enough of them to elevate this comic much.

CONCLUSION

Every comic is a labor of love for someone.  The letters page in Blindside tells me that Marat Mychaels created this character when he was 14 years old and had been waiting years for a chance to bring his idea to the comic world.  Unfortunately, the actual execution of Blindside when he finally got that chance didn't do Mychaels' enthusiasm for the character any justice.

From what I see, he took the character elsewhere, where it didn't fare much better. . .2 issues of an aborted mini-series and a couple of guest appearances.  I give Mychaels credit for trying, but I guess sometimes things just don't work out.

In my humble opinion, Mychaels isn't much of a writer. Blindside might have worked if he had recognized this and let someone else write his character. . .but the early days of Image are littered with failed projects where one guy tried to wear all the hats.  This is a fine example of exactly that.

Unfortunately, I can't really recommend Blindside, except as a curiosity. . .an abandoned relic of the 90s that may interest someone just for that.  The writing is somehow overblown and forgettable at the same time.  The art has moments, but not enough of them.  There's really not much to like here.

Up Next. . .

It's the origin story of one of DC's most unusual superheroes and his team. . .

CAPTAIN CARROT AND HIS AMAZING ZOO CREW! 

Guest Starring Superman because he must have lost some sort of bet.

Be there or be square!

Longbox Junk - WildC.A.T.s: Covert Action Teams #1

Welcome to Longbox Junk, where the comics are cheap and the reviews are free!

October has passed and here we are in November already!  I didn't get quite as many entries for the 2021 Longbox Junk Halloween Horror Party in as I would have liked to, but I still had a lot of fun spotlighting some of the new horror comics on the stands.

But now it's time to get back into the bargain bins!  

Before getting into Halloween mode, I was taking a look at some of the comics that you're practically guaranteed to find in just about any bargain bin you might happen to be digging through.  Let's continue on with that, shall we?  We shall!

The comic at hand is the first issue of another one of Image's early "We wanna be Marvel!" series.  Actually, it's from one of their FIRST series that they put out, and one of the original "hot" titles that grabbed public attention and pretty much got the ball rolling for Image in their early years.  

WildC.A.T.s was founding Image partner and superstar artist Jim Lee's first creator owned project, and when it hit the stands it was HUGE.  A quick bit of internet research tells me that wholesale sales to retailers for this first issue were right up there at about ONE MILLION COPIES!  

So there were a LOT of copies of the early issues of this series sold, which is why you can reliably find them in just about any bargain bin you might be Longbox Junkin' and cheap comic spelunkin' in.  But now the question becomes: Is this ubiquitous relic of the 90s comic boom any good?  

Let's find out!

WILDC.A.T.S: COVERT ACTION TEAMS #1

Image (1992)

RESURRECTION DAY

SCRIPT: Jim Lee & Brandon Choi

PENCILS: Jim Lee

INKS: Scott Williams

COVER: Jim Lee & Scott Williams

THE COVER:

It's a little busy in that special 90s-tastic way, but I like it!  The bright colors pop, it's nicely drawn, and it really catches the eye.  It's just a good, classic team hero pose cover.  Nothing spectacular, but it's definitely worthy of a turn up on the "Wall O' Covers" in my office at work now and then. . .but now that I think of it,  Zealot's outfit IS a little too skimpy for the workplace, so probably not.  Still a solid cover, overall.  Let's get inside!

THE STORY:

We begin our tale with several flashback scenes as a mysterious woman seems to be travelling through time searching for someone. . .

We follow her to the 1990's, where she rescues a homeless man named Jacob Marlowe from an attack.  We learn that she calls herself Void and that Marlowe is actually "Lord Emp", one of the four Lords of Power, belonging to an alien race known as the Kherubim, and the Champion of Mankind!  She tells him that she's been sent to find him in order to prepare for a coming war.

Flashing forward a few years and find that the formerly homeless Marlowe is now a multi-billionaire at the head of the international Halo Corporation.  He seems to be reluctant to accept his role as hero and champion of the human race in an upcoming war, but Void insists that preparations continue to be made. . .

To prepare for the upcoming battle, Marlowe and Void have been gathering a group of "gifted" warriors with superhuman abilities.  We are introduced to several of them, including team leader "Spartan", a highly-advanced android almost indistinguishable from a human, "Warblade", a hybrid human/alien able to transform his body like liquid metal, and "Maul", another human/alien hybrid able to increase and decrease his body mass, with his intelligence going down as his mass goes up, and likewise his intelligence increasing as he becomes smaller.

IN THE MEANTIME. . .

Moving away from Marlowe and his team, we look in on their opposition, the Cabal.  Led by an alien being known as Helspont (a member of a race called Daemonites) and based aboard a gigantic hidden submarine, they are also gathering warriors for the upcoming battle.   They have discovered a new "gifted" being and are determined to get to her first before their Kherubim enemies. . .

ELSEWHERE. . .

We follow a mysterious man into a strip club, where a dancer is attacked by a group of men who are revealed to actually be alien Daemonites when we learn that the dancer, "Voodoo" can see them for who they truly are.  

Luckily for her, the mysterious man we were following at first turns out to be a Kherubim agent. Called "Grifter", he is a supernaturally-gifted marksman and hand to hand fighter.  He's there to find Voodoo, but his partner is nowhere to be found.  He leaps into the battle as the Daemonites drop their disguises and begin killing everyone in sight!

As the battle continues and casualties mount, Marlowe sees news reports about what's happening.  He and his team move swiftly to the scene and join in the fight!

Even with the extra firepower, the Kherubim agents are faced with a brutal battle, but when Grifter's missing partner, the warrior known as "Sister Zealot", a highly-skilled Kherubim assassin/monk from a secret society known as the "Coda", finally arrives, the battle against the Daemonites is ended in short order.

After the battle, Zealot introduces herself to Marlowe and informs him that they are also Kherubim and have the same goals in protecting Voodoo.  Marlowe invites Zealot and Grifter to his Halo base so that they can further confer on what to do next.  But as they talk, a surviving Daemonite detonates an explosive, destroying the strip club!

At the end, with Voodoo and her Kherubim protectors seemingly dead, we see Helspont making plans with one his Daemonite agents. . .Vice President of the United States, Dan Quayle!  DUN-DUN-DUUUUUUNN!!

To be continued. . .

THE REVIEW:

Allrighty, then. . .let's break it on down!

There are a few things that I expect the first issue of a comic series to provide.  A bare minimum bar of expectations that I don't think are too much to ask in return for considering giving a company my money for their comics on a monthly basis.  This series is long completed, but it's new to ME, so I hold it to the same standard as any other first issue.

FIRST. . .Does it introduce new characters and their situation in an easy to understand manner?  Weeeeeeell. . .sorta.  This isn't really a great introduction to these characters and what's happening.  It's not terrible, but things are just thrown at the reader one after the other with very little explanation.

In 2021, I have the advantage of going to Wikipedia and seeing that this story is about a  centuries-long war between two alien races, the Kherubim. . .a nearly immortal race that resemble humans and have a variety of exceptional powers and skills, and the Daemonites. . .a hideous-appearing race whose main powers are possession and mind control of other beings.  

Unfortunately for readers in 1992, the internet wasn't quite what it is today and the reader of this comic was sort of on their own to pick out the story between the lines.  It jumps around and it's kind of hard to see how the pieces fit together.

SECOND. . .Does it make me want to read the next issue?  Honestly, not really.  This first issue throws so much at the reader that it makes it kind of hard to become invested in any of it.  This comic came out at a time when a series could be driven by the art alone.  It looks like that was exactly what Image was banking on here, because truthfully, the story just isn't that interesting. 

Don't get me wrong, it's not a BAD story.  it's just sort of. . .there.  Serving as a framework for Jim Lee's art.  But once you get past the art, what you have is a pretty average story that is shamelessly an "edgy" mix of the X-Men and Avengers in that early Image "We want to be Marvel!" manner.  

So this is pretty much a comic built around the art, with the story as an afterthought.  Okay, fair enough, I guess.  So let's talk about the main attraction then.  Jim Lee is a modern comic legend for good reason, and you can see that reason in this comic.

Yeah, there's belts and buckles and pouches galore, in the most 90s-Tastic way.  Yeah, there's impossibly-built women in cheesecake poses meant to appeal to the lowest common male denominator.  But once you get past the 90s excess, you can see TRUE talent shining through on every page of this comic!  

Jim Lee gives these pages a feeling of motion and movement, full of detail and action that is definitely the signature look of one of the modern greats.  Where the story falls flat, the art is vibrant and exciting.  I can definitely see why this comic was such a huge hit when it came out.  

CONCLUSION

On the one hand, we have a story that's pretty average.  It doesn't quite reach the bare minimum first issue expectations of introducing new characters and situations in an easy to read and understand manner.  It also fails to hook me into wanting to read the next issue, with characters thrown so quickly into the mix that it's hard to get invested in what happens to any of them.

On the other hand, we have a fantastic example of some great art from one of the great modern artists, Jim Lee.  His pencils are dynamic, vibrant, and interesting once you get past some of the notorious 90s excesses.

Taken together, there's a comic worth reading here.  The story isn't ALL bad, and the art definitely hits some 90s low points here and there.  Overall, it adds up to a decent comic that is still pretty readable even almost 30 years down the road (1992 was almost THIRTY YEARS ago? Damn, I feel old!)

If you're digging through a bargain bin, chances are you WILL spot one of these.  Go ahead, spend a buck and give it a read.  It's not the best 90s comic I've ever read, but it's far from the worst.

Up Next. . .

More of that sweet Longbox Junk that you're practically guaranteed to find!

How about we take a look at something from Marvel's New Universe?

DP7? Justice? Nightmask? Psi-Force? Star Brand?  I've got 'em ALL!

Decisions. . .decisions.

Be there or be square!

Longbox Junk Halloween - The Silver Coin #1

Welcome to the Longbox Junk Halloween Horror Party!  It's where for one month out of the year, you're actually ENCOURAGED to take candy from strangers. . .

This year, I've decided to take a look at some fresh NEW horror comics.

Nothing older than 2019 fresh.  Now THAT'S fresh, for Longbox Junk.

Last time out, I spotlighted a bit of  slow burn character-driven horror centered around fear of the unknown.  This time around, let's get into a little bit of more traditional horror in the first issue of a great new anthology series from Image, with a story that reminds us to be careful what you wish for, because you might just get it. . .

Ready? Let's do this!

SPOILER ALERT!  This series is still ongoing (on issue #5 at this writing), and there will be spoilers.  But since this is an anthology series with a different writer and story in each issue, it probably doesn't matter as much as with something continued from issue to issue.  Still, if you want NO spoilers, just skip down to the "Conclusion". END SPOILER ALERT

THE SILVER COIN #1

Image (2021)

THE TICKET

SCRIPT: Chip Zdarsky

PENCILS: Michael Walsh

INKS: Michael Walsh

COVER: Michael Walsh

THE COVER:

You can tell this is gonna be a dark story right from the cover.  You can see it in the horrified eyes of the guitar player as he literally plays his fingers to the bone.  The blood streaks on the fret board are especially chilling! It simple, but in its simplicity it's a real eye-catcher. Just a great cover.  Let's get inside and see what's going on here. . .

THE STORY:

In 1978 disco is king, which is unfortunate for rock guitar player Ryan and his band, barely scratching along by playing opening gigs at empty bars early in the evening before the disco bands show up.

But Ryan's luck is about to change!  When he finds an old silver coin while going through some old boxes at his father's house, he decides to use it as a pick during practice.  To the entire band's astonishment, they play better than they've ever dreamed of!

Realizing that there's something strange about the coin, they decide to use it at their regular gigs.  In only a few weeks the previously empty bar begins to fill with cheering customers.  They're bringing in so much business that the owner of the bar tells Ryan that he's got a friend from Polygram records he's going to invite to one of their shows!  

The record company rep tells Ryan that he's great. . .but rock is dead and disco is king.  Ryan leaves his band and joins a disco group, playing to bigger and bigger crowds with single-minded determination to be the very best.

But then, one fateful night, Ryan plays to a wild, packed house and he discovers to his horror that he CAN'T stop playing!  As he shreds his fingers to the bone on his guitar strings, the crowd keeps dancing, even as the building burns down around them!

Later, we see firefighters in the ashes of the club commenting on how strange it was that nobody even tried to escape the fire.  We end with a fireman discovering and keeping the silver coin.

The End.

THE REVIEW:

Now THAT was a sweet little nugget of Longbox Junk!  It's a pretty straightforward story of a guy who wants to be the best and getting what he wished for. . .but not for long, and at a steep price.  It follows a tried and true story path that's been around longer than most, but the late 70's setting gives the story an interesting feel that gives the old "Be careful what you wish for" a bit of new life.

Zdarsky's writing in general gives this well-worn story path new life, with characters and dialogue that ring true even though we only get to know them for such a short time.  But be warned. . .there's a lot of profanity in this one.  I guess that's one of the hallmarks of this new wave of horror comics on the stand now.  Realistic dialogue means lots of F-Bombs.  So, like the first comic I reviewed for this Longbox Junk Halloween party. . .if you don't like naughty words in your funny books, you probably won't like this very much.  They're on just about every page.

On the art side of things, Michael Walsh's kinetic style is PERFECT for this rock-n-roll horror story!  The figures have a sense of motion and life that almost moves across the page!  His lines are dark and nightmarish, the colors are bold, and every page is worth lingering over.  

CONCLUSION

Overall, we have a story that follows the tried and true path of "Be careful of what you wish for", but given a spark of new life with an interesting 70's setting and well-sketched characters with great dialogue.  Once again, be warned that there's a lot of profanity to be found, but it fits in with the rock-n-roll setting of the story.

The story is perfectly backed up with some dark and nightmarish art that serves to compliment, rather than distract.  Every page in this comic is worth lingering over for an extra second or two.  This first issue is a practically perfect storm of words and art.

In my humble opinion, The Silver Coin is one of the best new horror series out there right now.  If you check out ANY of the comics I spotlight during this year's Longbox Junk Halloween Horror Party, check out THIS one.  If you're a horror comic fan, take my advice and seek this series out.

Each issue has its own story, loosely connected by the mysterious silver coin (and the 5th issue has the origin of the coin), and each issue is an almost perfect little nugget of Longbox Junk gold.  I'm a big fan of anthology comics of the past, and this series stands right there with the best of them.  

Up Next. . .

I'm keeping the Longbox Junk Halloween Horror party going!

It's a comic series based on the hit horror franchise, and a prequel to the latest movie in the series, it's DC's The Conjuring: The Lover.  Comic book movie tie-ins are usually hit or miss, without much in between.  Which one will this be?  Let's find out!

Be there or be square!

Longbox Junk - Wetworks #1

Welcome to Longbox Junk, the place to find all the comic reviews you never asked anyone for!

I've mentioned it before, but when you dive into a cheap box of back issues, there are certain things you're practically guaranteed to find.  The comic at hand is one of those things. 

 If I were standing next to you at a comic shop, I'd feel safe betting you five bucks sight unseen that you would come across at LEAST one issue from this series while digging through the bargain bin.  Maybe not this one, but at least one from the run.

It's just one of those things. Don't fight it.  It's gonna happen.

What we have here is a relic of Image's early years on the comic scene.  These days, Image has carved out a very nice little niche as the publisher you want to go to when you get tired of reading about superheroes.  But in their early days, Image was ALL superhero ALL the time.  

They put out such a flood of superhero comics. . .throwing anything and everything at the wall to see what would stick. . .that bargain bins to this day are still full of them, and I don't see the supply of Image 90's superhero comics coming up short any time soon.  As in ever.  Early Image comics are practically the definition of Longbox Junk.

So let's take a look at one of these leftover comics from Image's early "We wanna be Marvel!" days and see what's going on in there.  Strap in, folks. . .we've got Covert Ops, Alien Symbiotes, and Vampires!  

Ready?  Let's do it!

WETWORKS #1

Image (1994)

And folded out in all its 90's gimmick cover glory!

SCRIPT: Whilce Portacio & Brandon Choi

PENCILS: Whilce Portacio

INKS: Scott Williams, John Tighe, John Dickenson & Rick Johnson

COLORS: Joe Chiodo, Monica Bennett & Martin Jimenez

COVER: Whilce Portacio & Scott Williams

THE COVER:

We've got a 90's special gimmick triple fold out cover here, folks! And it's. . .pretty impressive!

Yeah, it's got straps a-plenty.  It's got gun arms.  It's got bandoliers everywhere.  There's those strange 90's head thingy's that aren't really a mask, but sort of are?  Is there even a word for them?  But even though there's a checklist of everything people hate about 90's comics, it works here.  

The cover is basically a hero pose montage of the main group of characters, and I have to admit, it's a pretty good one.  I think it's the great colors that makes this work so well. The shiny gold of the symbiotes really catch the eye and make this cover stand out. 

 It ain't the greatest comic cover ever, but it's not bad for what it is.  Let's get inside!

THE STORY:

We begin our tale aboard a high-tech stealth transport over the Balkans.  Inside is America's most elite covert ops squad, Team 7, on their way to a secret mission they know little to nothing about. . .

As they discuss their possible reasons for being over Transylvania, the leader of Team 7, Lt. Col. Jackson Dane, gives the team a more detailed briefing.  Their mission is to infiltrate a terrorist faction's secret base and retrieve a highly-contagious biological weapon that they plan on unleashing on Europe at any cost.

MEANWHILE, IN WASHINGTON, D.C.

Miles Craven, leader of I.O. (International Operations) and the world's most obvious villain, is arguing with Admiral Halsey (Commanding officer of Team 7) over the lack of information being given to his Team.  Craven informs him that there's much bigger stakes than Halsey can imagine, and when the Admiral sees the information Craven gives him, he agrees that Team 7 is expendable, if need be.

BACK IN TRANSYLVANIA. . .

Team 7's Cyber-Enhanced liaison officer (Code Named "Mother One") observes the squad as they deploy near their target and begin their recon of the area.  We learn that she is also in charge of a "Cleaner" unit that is tasked with disposing of anyone, enemy OR friendly, that makes it out of the secret base alive.

As Team 7 makes their way into the hidden terrorist base, they're surprised to discover that someone has gotten there before them.  The base's defenses are down and there's evidence of a massive battle having recently taken place.  

As they investigate, the demolition charges they are carrying suddenly activate on their own!  Seeing that they only have 10 minutes before the explosives go off, the team hurries toward the main laboratory, determined to accomplish their mission in the short time they have. . .

As the team bursts into the seemingly-deserted laboratory, they discover large tubes filled with some sort of golden liquid. Dane suspects the team has been led into a trap, but continues with the mission, ordering his squad to set the charges, which are still counting down to detonation. . .

As Team 7 goes about the task of setting the demolition charges, a mysterious woman pops out of a vent and shoots one of the tubes, rupturing it and causing the golden fluid to splash onto Claymore, one of Team 7's heavy weapons experts!

As the mysterious fluid covers Claymore with a golden skin, two gunmen attack Team 7!  Their bullets bounce harmlessly off of Claymore, enabling the rest of the team to quickly take down the ambushers.  But they soon discover that the attackers aren't Transylvanian terrorists. . .from the damage they were able to take before they died, Dane has doubts they are even human!

Before they can investigate further, they are attacked by a larger force.  Dane decides that there's too much going on that they don't know about and decides to scrap the mission and fight their way out of the base before the demolition charges detonate.   The team quickly realizes that they are surrounded and they're going to have to resort to desperate measures to make it out alive. . .

As Claymore uses his new bulletproof skin to try and clear a path for the rest of the team, the Demolition charges finally detonate!  He is horrified to realize after the massive explosion that he is probably the only one who managed to escape the laboratory. . .

BUT. . .

The rest of Team 7 soon arrives to help Claymore finish fighting his way through the strangely-inhuman fighters that have him surrounded.  Realizing their impending fate, Dane took a risk and commanded the other tanks be destroyed. Now each member of Team 7 is coated with the same shining gold skin as Claymore!

As the team fights their way through the surrounding inhumanly-strong attackers, they barely manage to make it out of the hidden base before the secondary charges they'd set earlier explode, completely obliterating the base along with the remaining defenders.

Dane and the rest of Team 7 have survived, but now they want some answers!

Learning that Team 7 has made it out of the base alive, Craven orders Mother One and the I.O. Cleaner team to finish them off!  Realizing that they are under attack by I.O. gunships, Dane orders Team 7 to try and escape the area, but they are unable to elude their pursuers. . .

Knowing that even with the added protection of the mysterious symbiote fluid Team 7 won't be able to withstand the firepower of the I.O. gunships, Mother One turns on her allies and attacks the gunships, destroying them and enabling Team 7 to escape.

She reveals herself, clad in the same shining golden skin as Team 7, and reveals that they have been betrayed by their superiors and sacrificed.  Mother One informs the team that the supernaturally-tough opponents they have been fighting are actually vampires!  

Then she offers them a chance at a new life.  Since Team 7 is believed to be dead, she tells them that her employer is engaged in an underground war with the vampires and could use skilled soldiers like them.  Having nowhere else to go and needing more answers, Dane reluctantly agrees.

EPILOGUE:

In the ruins of the laboratory, we find one of the leaders of the vampires, Prince Drakken, enraged at the destruction of the base and the theft of the symbiotes.  We leave the story with him vowing to take the fight to the humans and once again teaching them to fear the night!

The End. . .To Be Continued.

THE REVIEW:

Allrighty then! There it is. . .Wetworks #1.   Let's break it on down!

I have to admit that I wasn't very confident that this comic was going to be good.  I figure there's a reason (besides Image printing God knows how many issues of all these early superhero titles) that this series is consistently found in the bargain bin.  But truthfully, it ain't too bad.

Now, don't get me wrong. This isn't a great comic.  It's sort of hovering right around the "pretty good" center line of the comic dial. But it's better than I thought it would be coming into this review. 

 It's surprisingly readable where many other early Image efforts are basically just a hot mess screaming past the reader on a straight-line drag strip of style over substance.  An early Image hallmark of banking on a "Hot" artist being able to sell a comic and just sort of hoping nobody notices the crap story underneath the frantic artwork.

To be fair, it DOES look like Image was mostly banking on Whilce Portacio's art to do the heavy lifting for Wetworks, and he's actually up to the task. . .but the strange mashup of military action, science fiction, and the supernatural offered up by Portacio and Brandon Choi is actually a pretty compelling start to what seems to be shaping up as an interesting take on the typical high-tech superhero story.

It makes me want to see what happens next and maybe pull a few more of these comics from the bargain bin next time I go Longbox Junkin' instead of almost unconsciously passing them by like I normally do.

So the story is actually interesting and not an afterthought.  Refreshing for an early Image superhero title.  Let's take a look at the art side of things.  

Like I said above, it's pretty clear that Image was (as Image does) banking on Whilce Portacio's art to carry Wetworks, so the art is definitely the star of the show here and Portacio doesn't disapppoint!  Is it the greatest art I've ever seen in a comic book?  Not even close.  But it DOES have a dark, gritty style to it that is perfectly matched to this strange science fiction/military/supernatural mashup.  

I give a credit due to the inking team (all FOUR of them!) for really bringing out the detail in Portacio's pencils and making the colors pop in contrast to rich, deep blacks through the whole issue.  

Beyond that, Portacio gives us some really interesting character designs and a unique look for this series where a lot of early Image stuff sort of blended together in a forgettable mess.  Simply put, the artwork throughout Wetworks #1 is 90's-Tastic in a GOOD way!

CONCLUSION

I didn't have high hopes for this comic coming in.  I basically picked it because I've always just passed Wetworks by in the bargain bin, assuming it's just another Image superhero title that's got some flashy art but a weak story.  I just decided it was time to actually READ an issue.

I was pleasantly surprised to find an interesting mashup of genres backed up by some very nice, gritty artwork, and a first issue that delivered on my expectations of introducing a story and new characters in a way that makes me want to read the next issue in the series.

Wetworks isn't the greatest comic I've ever read.  But it's a long way away from the worst.  In my humble opinion, it ain't half bad!  If you are a fan of "hard" military stories with some science fiction flavor then Wetworks will definitely be worth your time to give it a look.  

Up Next. . .

More of the kind of Longbox Junk I ALWAYS spot in the bargain bin.

I think I'll head on over to Malibu's Ultraverse and see what's happening.

Night Man?  Yeah. . .why not? Night Man!

Be there or be square.