Longbox Junk - The Terminator #1

 Welcome to Longbox Junk, the blog absolutely stuffed with comic reviews nobody asked me to write!

Terminators.

Relentless killing machines created by the all-powerful computer, Skynet.  Their only purpose to infiltrate and destroy the last remaining vestiges of human resistance in one of the bleakest futures ever to be put on the silver screen or the comic page.

I LOVE The Terminator franchise! Within the framework of a dark future ruled by machines, there's potential to tell both hopeful AND hopeless tales of resistance and desperate battle against inhuman monsters created by mankind's own technological hubris.  

There's been a lot of Terminator comic stories.  Probably the best known coming from Dark Horse, who held the Terminator license for about twenty years!  But what we have here is the FIRST Terminator comic book.  The opening issue for a 1988 series by NOW Comics that lasted just 17 issues before handing things over to Dark Horse.

It seems a bit strange to me that the first comic to expand on such a popular franchise is worth about. . .well. . .pretty much nothing when it comes to "key" value of comic books.  MAYBE ten bucks for a absolutely perfect copy. . .in theory, anyway.  This is a series that you can find every single issue of (including this first issue) in the bargain bin.

But, like everything else with over thirty years' worth of material behind it, there's good Terminator stories and there's bad Terminator stories.  Which one is this?  Let's find out!

THE TERMINATOR #1

NOW Comics (1988)

COVER: Mitch O'Connell

THE COVER:

Now THERE'S the good stuff!  I've got a lot of Terminator comics in my collection, but this is my all-time favorite Terminator cover!  It's just. . .perfect. It's a great, creepy piece of highly-detailed artwork that can stand toe to toe with some of the best comic covers out there, period.

So the cover is one of my favorites in my collection.  What about the story?  

Let's get inside this thing!  

THE STORY:

THE TERMINATOR

SCRIPT:  Fred Schiller

PENCILS: Tony Akins

INKS: Jim Brozman

The time: December 22, 2031. The Place: Just North of what's left of Miami, Florida.

We begin our tale with a woman, carrying a baby and being pursued through the ruins of Miami by a relentless killing machine. . .a Terminator. She trips and falls.  The Terminator moves in for the kill!

The woman is saved by the timely arrival of a team of human soldiers.  The Terminator is destroyed and she tells them that she's looking for an underground group called "Sarah's Slammers".  Her baby is sick and she needs a doctor.  

She's in luck.  The soldiers belong to the Slammers and offer to take her and her baby back to their hidden base for medical treatment.  But then, one of the soldiers gets a bad feeling about the situation and blasts the woman!  She's actually a Terminator!  IT'S A TRAP!

As the patrol tries to make sense of the ambush, they move to rescue the child, only to discover that it's ALSO a Terminator!  A tiny baby Terminator!  THE HORROR!  

SHIFTING SCENES. . .

We find ourselves aboard a high-tech aircraft, hovering over the ocean nearby.  The crew of the ship is led by a woman named Berwanger.  They are scientists, gathering plankton samples to take back to their base.  There's a problem!  An accident and the ship's systems begin to fail!

Their stealth cloaking device and thrusters go offline. The ship begins to drift toward the mainland, where their sensors indicate an intense firefight is occurring!

  

RETURNING TO SARAH'S SLAMMERS. . .

More Terminators have arrived at the scene of the trap!  The Slammers are pinned down by heavy fire.  As they desperately fight for their lives, we see the mysterious aircraft drifting closer as the crew tries to reactivate their cloaking device, thrusters, and shields.  It's too late!  The cloak completely fails and the ship is exposed to those fighting below.

Mistaking the disabled aircraft as a new kind of Terminator ship, Sarah's Slammers turn all their firepower onto it, causing the vessel to crash nearby.  The Slammer Commander, Leahy, orders her men to retreat before they take any more losses.  

Nearby, the surviving crew of the crashed aircraft have abandoned ship.  As they make their way along the shoreline, they run into the retreating soldiers.  There's a standoff between the two groups.  Leahy is informed that there's another Terminator transport on the way.  They need to figure things out and get moving before they're overwhelmed!

The crew of the downed aircraft use a high-tech homing missile to easily take down the approaching transport.  But Leahy learns another FOUR transports are on their way!  

Impressed with the newcomer's weapons, Leahy quickly makes the decision to invite them to the Slammer's hidden base.  They all leave together before Terminator reinforcements arrive.

SHIFTING SCENES AGAIN. . .

We find ourselves following Martin Reedfoot, one of Sarah's Slammers on a mission to infiltrate a Skynet "Flesh Farm" to gain intel on the facility.  

The Flesh Farms are a recent Skynet project, breeding and cultivating docile human servants. . .and also providing a ready supply of human skin for their Terminators. 

As he makes his way through the eerie town of Bedford Falls, gathering information on the docile human population, Reedfoot is discovered by one of the Terminator guards!

MEANWHILE, AT THE HIDDEN INSURGENT BASE. . .

Sarah's Slammers are based in an old Minuteman missile silo that they imaginatively call "Homebase".  We learn that the crew of the mysterious aircraft are actually from. . .The Moon!

They are the children of inhabitants of a moon colony called "Little Houston", who could only watch in horror as Skynet took over the world 33 years ago.  There was strife in the colony about what to do, but it was decided that there wasn't much they COULD do, and so they remained on the moon.  

They have to occasionally return to Earth for secret resource-gathering missions in their cloaked ships.  It was during one of these missions that their ship was shot down, and how they ended up with a bunch of rag-tag insurgents hiding out in an old missile silo.

BACK AT THE FLESH FARM. . .

Reedfoot desperately tries to make his escape from the Terminators at Bedford Falls, but he is surrounded.  He sends a burst transmission to Homebase with the information he's gathered.  After that, his fate is uncertain. . .

AND THEN, BACK AT THE INSURGENT BASE. . .

Berwanger and Leahy have a bit of conflict over the moon base's inaction while humans bleed and suffer on Earth, but they eventually come to an agreement once Reedfoot's information is received.

Berwanger agrees to supply Sarah's Slammers with weapons and medical supplies in exchange for equipment and parts needed to fix their ship.  Unfortunately, the high-tech gear needed will only be available at a Skynet facility. . .like the Flesh Farm Reedfoot was scouting.    

Leahy agrees to help Sarah's Slammers assault the facility.

BUT THEN. . .

While Leahy and Berwanger discuss their agreement, there's a commotion elsewhere in the base!  The Slammer's viral scanners have detected a non-human! There's a Terminator among them!  It's one of the Moon Crew!  

BUT WAIT! THEY CAN EXPLAIN!

To be continued. . .

THE REVIEW:

Okay, there it is.  Let's break it on down!

I review a lot of first issues here at Longbox Junk.  I have just TWO simple expectations from the first issue of a series.  And in MY humble opinion, neither one is too much to ask. . .

1.  Does it introduce the characters and their situation in a new reader-friendly way?

2.  Does it make me want to read more?

Is that too much to ask?  You'd think not, but there are a lot of first issues I've read that can't even hurdle those two pretty low bars.  But hey, I don't write 'em. . .I just read 'em. 

 I guess comic publishers know what they're doing when they decide that a good introduction and a hook to buy the next issue aren't necessary.  Who am I to tell them THEIR business, right?

ANYWAY. . . 

Question number one. . .is this a good introduction?  Well, the whole issue is basically introduction, so I'll say yes on this one.  Actually, I really liked the story in this issue. 

Even though it was almost completely introduction to the characters and the setting, the writer moves it along at a pretty brisk pace and we get all the information we need organically as the story unfolds instead of it looking like an obvious info-dump, which is ALMOST as bad as not getting enough information in a first issue.

It's a gritty, hard military science fiction story.  Very straightforward in laying out the brutal nature of what the world has become.  I like the addition of the Moon Colonists as a sort of "privileged" storytelling foil to the hardcore Sarah's Slammers.  The colonists make it so the writer is able to give more than one perspective on the same events (more so in later issues, but that foundation is nicely set up here).

Question number two. . .Do I want to read more?  Yes I do.  I'm a fan of gritty military science fiction, which is what draws me to the Terminator franchise in the first place.  

Even though what we have here is almost completely introduction and setup, it's solid introduction and setup.  I want to see how these two different groups come together to achieve their separate, but intertwined goals as the story unfolds.  

BUT. . .

Then there's the art.  Let's talk about the art.

It's bad.

Garish colors, practically nonexistent backgrounds, sketchy, and in places looking almost unfinished.  This comic has an AWESOME cover, but inside? No Bueno. 

It's an issue that a lot of NOW comics suffered.  Great, eye-catching covers with good stories, but art that slaps and insults you. . .and not in the fun way.  What I'm trying to say is that the art in this comic is crap.  There's no tiptoeing around it.  The cover is premium, the inside is amateurish.  

CONCLUSION

So, a solid military science fiction story that delivers a good introduction and makes me want to read more, backed up by art that looks like the logical progression of Napoleon Dynamite's high school sketches.

Is the art bad enough to make me not want to recommend this?  I guess not.  The story is good and the art DOES get a little better as the series goes on.  Not by much, mind you, and the garish colors never go away, but there's improvement at least.

This isn't the best Terminator comic out there.  Not even close.  But it's a cool little time capsule of the time before Terminator WAS a franchise.  There was the first movie, and there was this.  That was it.

NOW took the Terminator idea and ran with it. . .giving us a thirty year time jump into what was one of the best parts of the original movie, the short scenes showing future humanity fighting the terrifying robots of Skynet.

For just the sheer non-canon, "Where do we go from here?" aspect of this series jumping off of the very narrow starting point of the original Terminator movie, I'll recommend this series.  Just understand the art is generally awful from start to finish, even though it does show some improvement in later issues.

The series has never been collected, as far as I can tell, but like I said in the introduction, it's not hard to find every issue (including this first issue) in the bargain bins.  Pick 'em up and check 'em out if you happen to spot some.  

That's it for this edition of Longbox Junk.  Thanks for stopping by to spend a little time, and I hope you come to visit again.  Until next time, remember that comics are worth more than money!

Longbox Junk - Terminator: The Burning Earth

Welcome back to Longbox Junk, home of comic book reviews that nobody ever asked me for! 

"Rescue Reviews" are reviews that I wrote for a well-known comic site (that shall remain nameless) that I worked for years ago.  Now that the site in question has become more of a. . .how shall I say. . .comic RELATED site, I've decided to pull these from their dusty and hard to find archives, polish them up a bit, and put them in a place where people who still care about comic BOOKS might enjoy them.

ANYWAY. . .

What we have here is an interesting little relic of its time, featuring the first professional work of ridiculously famous comic artist Alex Ross (or Alexander Ross, as he's credited here).  This "Rescue Review" is based more on an original draft I had saved than the severely-edited published version, so it's a bit longer than some of the other Rescue Reviews, but not quite as long-winded as future Longbox Junk entries.

On a re-read of the comics themselves, I pretty much agree with what was originally written in the review, so I'll let it stand with just a bit of spit shine and some new pictures.  Let's do it!

ORIGINAL INTRO:

Welcome back to 1990. A distant, long-ago time without internet and where people apparently didn't understand the concept of "Backup Power Generators". It was a time when they didn't know there were going to be several movie sequels to The Terminator, so Terminator comics could pretty much do whatever they wanted. Oh. . .and welcome to superstar artist Alex Ross' first professional comic job!

TERMINATOR:

THE BURNING EARTH

NOW Comics (1990)

SCRIPTS: Ron Fortier

PENCILS: Alexander Ross

COVERS: Alexander Ross

ISSUE 1

WELCOME TO HELL

Yep. . .it's signed! They're ALL signed!

Right out of the gate, let's get this out of the way. . .this is NOT the Alex Ross we all know and love.

This is ALEXANDER Ross's first professional comic work.

It's not bad at all, it's pretty damn good, really. . .but it's not superstar Alex Ross as we have come to know him. It's dark and pretty muddy in some spots. It's a LOT rougher than his work to come. The lines aren't sharp and defined in his more well-known hyper-realistic style. This book looks like he drew it with colored pencils. That said, you can see flashes of brilliance to come here and there. It's not BAD, but it's not what you would expect seeing Alex Ross' name on it.

Wait. . .is this Battlestar Galactica?

The story is as dark and grim as the art. It's 40 years after the first Terminator movie (this book came out before T2, so it has nothing to do with the timeline established in later films. It's based on the first movie ONLY) and John Connor is a grizzled, grey-haired warrior tired of fighting to the point that one scene shows him with a gun in his mouth wishing he could sleep for more than an hour at a time. Pretty brutal. No "Hasta La Vista Baybee" quips in this book.

I have to say I liked this first issue a lot. If you read it, you just have to come into it with the viewpoint that ONLY the first movie existed at this time. I have high hopes for the rest of the series.

If there's one thing I really have to complain about. . .and really it's more of a questionable thing. . .it's that Ross doesn't draw the Terminators like they were in the movie, with the skull-like heads and skeletal metal frames, but more like. . .Cylons? They have red-lit slits for eyes and helmet-like heads. It's just a strange thing that makes me wonder if Ross even watched the movie.

ISSUE 2

A BETTER MOUSE TRAP

This issue has the best cover of the series. . .except for one thing. I actually mistook the white highlights in her hair for fingerprints (I bought these at a flea market so I wouldn't be surprised if they were), but when I looked closer I saw they were intentional.

Those rough spots on the otherwise fantastic cover carry over into the issue itself. The art veers from awesome to crap from page to page and even sometimes from panel to panel. There's only two humans who are distinguishable. . .Connor and DeVerona. Connor because of his gray beard and long hair and DeVerona for his eye patch. I'm going to have a hard time caring for the inevitable deaths to come if I can't even tell the characters apart.

The story itself switches perspective to that of Skynet when it decides that allowing 3.7% of humanity to survive means that its programming is flawed and decides it's time to repair that flaw with some close range nuclear bombing.

I'm still liking this a lot. The second issue is not as strong as the first, though. . .and the subplot of Skynet creating sexy woman terminators (like the one on the cover) just seems like an excuse for Ross to draw some awesome D-Cups because "Aurora" is actually the most detailed art in the issue.

Chest Size Parameters: Optimal Distraction

ISSUE 3

KING OF THE MOUNTAIN

The quality of the art takes a serious dip in this issue, with hardly any flashes of the brilliant artist to come to be found. The entire issue is extremely dark and muddy. At first, I was like "It's raining and at night. Okay." But then one of the humans yells out "Sun's going down. We don't want to be out here after dark!" And I was like, "This is supposed to be during the DAY? What the Hell, Alexander Ross?"

Wait. . .what? You mean THIS is supposed to be during the day?

And then there's still the Cylon Terminators. I'm wondering if Ross even watched the movie before coming on this project. If not, then maybe he should have. . .

Still, all things considered, despite the rough art, this was a pretty good issue as the human resistance gathers their forces for an "all or nothing" assault on Skynet's main terminal at former NORAD base "Thunder Mountain".  There's a lot of great military action in this issue as Skynet becomes aware of the assault and human casualties mount.

ISSUE 4

THE LAST DAY

The art improves a good deal in this issue over the last. Unfortunately, the writing takes a turn for the worse as the humans assault the Skynet CPU and its power station in separate teams. Once again, I find it hard to care for any of these characters, as they are hardly distinguished between in either the art or the story. 

There is a decent sense of urgency, but there is also a bit of ex machina as Skynet's nuclear bombs dropped on Phoenix are so powerful they cause seismic disturbances that weaken it in NEVADA. 

Skynet is located in a NORAD base modeled after Cheyenne Mountain. A base created specifically to stand strong if a nuclear bomb is dropped directly on top of it. If "Thunder Mountain" is in Nevada, earthquakes from the bombing of Phoenix, Arizona shouldn't even bother it.

Then there's the idea that "Thunder Mountain" is powered by an outside power station and has no internal backup power. Ridiculous.

Still, despite having to suspend disbelief twice in 32 short pages, it's not BAD. . .it's just sort of lazy and not well thought out.

ISSUE 5

THE HEART OF SKYNET

And here we are at the big finish!

Unfortunately, this series ends with a whimper after it started with a bang. A damn shame.

Where Ross's art slumped a bit, then quickly improved, Fortier's writing went on a steady decline after a great setup.

I'm not sure if the blame can be placed on 1990 and that the internet as we know it didn't really exist at the time, but to base the climax of a story where the villain is basically a supercomputer gone mad on "If we just turn off the power, the computer is defeated" just seems so ridiculous that it pretty much ruined the ending for me as the human forces did exactly that. . .turned off the power by blowing up a power station. And there wasn't a backup power source in "Thunder Mountain". They just. . .switched off Skynet, shot the hell out of a computer monitor, and won the day.

Didn't they have backup generators in 1990? I realize the writer may not have understood the concept of "Internet" or "Cloud Storage" as we do today, but one has to wonder if Fortier understood the concept of "generator".

Then there's the whole "Aurora Model Terminator" that was introduced in issue 2. I think I called it right as an excuse for Ross to draw some D-Cups because after the big introduction, she was forgotten until this last issue, where she caught a grenade and was unceremoniously blown up. But hey, at least she looked great!

CONCLUSION

All in all, it was. . .okay. 

 The suspension of disbelief in the last two issues pretty much ruined the ending for me. I'd still suggest this mini, if just to see how far Alex Ross has progressed. The story itself isn't bad, it's just not great, and can't really be considered part of "Terminator Canon" because about everything in it was gone with the release of T2 a few years later. Well. . .at least we got a superstar artist out of this, so the good outweighs the bad.

2019 RE-READ COMMENTS

For what it is, this is actually a pretty good little piece of Longbox Junk. It's a quick-reading hard sci-fi military story set in a brutal, dark future. Yeah, there's some lazy writing and extreme suspension of disbelief needed toward the end, but at the end of the day it's a decent sequel to a movie that nobody thought would get a sequel (Let alone 5 sequels and a T.V. series).

 I bag on the art in the original review quite a bit, but when I talked to Alex Ross at a convention a few years back and asked him about it, he told me that when this series was done, he was 19 years old, living at home with his parents AND working a regular 9-5 job.  He actually regrets that he wasn't able to do a better job on this.  

Alex Ross' thoughts toward this story are that it was a humbling experience that he wasn't prepared at all for but the lessons learned led him to greater things. His attitude toward this series sort of made me see it in a different light when I realize it was done by a 19 year old kid living in his mom's basement and wondering if he'd ever make it as an artist.  

Up next. . .

Hopefully the first Longbox Junk Reader Request Edition will be finished.
If not, then another fabulous Rescue Review! Either way. . .

Be there or be square!

Longbox Junk - The Terminator: Enemy Of My Enemy

Terminators.

Relentless killing machines created by the all-powerful computer, Skynet.  Their only purpose to infiltrate and destroy the last remaining vestiges of human resistance in one of the bleakest futures ever to be put on the silver screen.

I love The Terminator franchise.  Within the framework of a dark future ruled by machines, there's potential to tell both hopeful AND hopeless tales of resistance and desperate battle against monsters created by mankind's own hubris.

Except for an interesting run by NOW comics, Dark Horse has been the caretaker of the Terminator comic franchise.  But like their other movie-based properties (Predator, Aliens, and Star Wars for a while), Dark Horse's Terminator offerings swing wildly in terms of quality.  Some of them are fantastic and thought-provoking.  Others are just plain bad.

What we have here is a Mini that came out fairly recently (2014) and, according to interviews I've seen with the creators, trying to set itself apart from earlier offerings with asking the question of, "What happens when a Terminator arrives and there's nobody from the future to tell anyone what's going on?"  An interesting idea.  

So. . .Is Enemy Of My Enemy one of Dark Horse's good Terminator stories?

Let's find out!

THE TERMINATOR:

ENEMY OF MY ENEMY

DARK HORSE (2014)

SCRIPTS: Dan Jolley

PENCILS: Jamal Igle

COVERS: Jamal Igle

ISSUE ONE

Farrow Greene, Ex CIA assassin - turned bounty hunter on the run takes on an assignment to track down and capture scientist Elise Wong. Unfortunately for Greene, her target is also being pursued by a deadly killing machine from the future. . .a Terminator. 

This first issue is mostly setup. It introduces the 3 main characters (Bounty hunter, Scientist and Terminator) and brings them together, then ends with a decent cliffhanger that makes me want to get right into the next issue.

Although it's decently-written, and asks the interesting question of what happens when a Terminator comes around and there's nobody else from the future to 'splain just what the hell's going on, the main character seems like a bit too much of a "Mary Sue".  

In other words, she's an unrelatable superwoman with any plot-convenient powers she needs to have. . .definitely NOT the average person in a terrifying situation against an unknown enemy advertised in creator interviews.  Just her basic description alone is enough to make the eyes roll:  Ex-CIA special operative turned bounty hunter?  Really?  This is a normal person?

Look. . .I'm not going to sit here and whine about "forced diversity" in comics and such, because I'm not that guy. But I WILL say that there IS a distinct whiff of overcompensation here in the female (check) gay (check) black (check) main character with any abilities needed to make it through any situation and leave it at that for now.  Just be fairly warned that if you ARE that guy who boils over at all things SJW. . .this comic ain't gonna do your blood pressure a bit of good. 

Other than the laughably overqualified main character, this was a pretty good introductory issue. The art was really neither here nor there. . .it tells the story, but doesn't really stand out in any way. It runs right down the middle of the road.

ISSUE TWO

After tracking down and recapturing Dr. Fong, Greene learns that she is working on a method to produce artificial skin in the laboratory. Unfortunately, both the Terminator and a shadowy government agency are after Dr. Fong as well. . . 

I actually liked this issue better than the first one. The story is beginning to open up a bit more as we learn what sort of research Dr. Fong is involved in. It makes sense to the reader why Skynet wants her dead (she is building a failsafe virus into her artificial skin that can destroy it if it turns cancerous) but it makes no sense to the characters in the story because they still don't realize the brutal guy chasing them is a killing machine from the future.

The addition of the government agency that knows a LITTLE about Terminators from the first "incident" (The original movie) is also interesting.

The art also improves in this issue, with some really great action scenes as Mary Sue. . .er. . .Greene. . .shows off her martial arts mastery against the Terminator. There's also a great set of silent panels showing the utter terror of a news helicopter pilot as the Terminator forces her to fly a search pattern over the city in search of Greene's car.

Some good visual storytelling right there. . .

Overall, even though I found this issue to be very enjoyable, I still find the main character to be a diversity checkbox superwoman with a skillset that Batman would be jealous of.

ISSUE THREE

Now THAT'S a sweet cover!

After Dr. Fong is captured by a secret government agency wanting to use her as bait in order to lure and capture the Terminator, Greene makes a deal with the Terminator to team up and rescue the scientist. 

Things start to break down in this third issue. It's not off the rails quite yet, but there's a few "WTF?" moments to be found that don't bode well at the halfway point of this story.

It starts off with a confusing sequence of Greene talking to herself in the apartment of a woman she's drugged while cutting her hair and changing clothes. It reeks of the writer trying to force some sympathetic exposition into the story, but it really comes off as "Of COURSE the superwoman has a tragic backstory. Of course she does."

THEN there's how the Terminator decides to chase Mary Sue. . .er. . .former agent Greene. . .instead of tracking down his actual target Dr. Fong. It's out of character for a relentless Terminator to get sidetracked like that when it's already been shown that it has the resourcefulness to discover where Fong was taken without Greene's help.

And finally, there's the "Deal" that Greene and the Terminator make to work together. It seems that it's the big twist in this story to try and set it apart. . .Terminator and Human working together. . .but it makes no sense, really. Whatever information Greene has could easily be gained by other methods by The Terminator.

Like I said above, It's not QUITE off the rails yet. . .but this series is heading into a curve at an inadvisable speed.

ISSUE FOUR

After a shadowy government agency captures Dr. Fong, The Terminator and Ex-Agent Greene come to an agreement to work together since neither of them alone can get to Fong. Agreeing that Fong's fate will be decided after retrieving her from captivity, Greene and The Terminator attack the compound where the scientist is being held. 

Most of this issue deals with Greene and the Terminator attacking a secret government compound where Dr. Fong is being held as bait to draw the Terminator out. . .so it's pretty much all battle action from beginning to end.

That said, there's a nice scene at the beginning where Terminator and Greene are assessing each other's combat capabilities that has a bit of deadpan Terminator-style humor that I liked.

It was also interesting to see that the government had been working on their own version of Terminators. . .crude and remote-controlled versions. 

Unfortunately, Greene continues to Mary Sue the hell out of things by adding sniper skills and the ability to survive an RPG blast to her already-expansive repertoire of superhuman abilities.

Then there's the government proto-Terminators. Yeah, it was interesting to see that they were there. . .but their ability to take down a Skynet killing machine from the future was pretty ridiculous.

Overall, this issue was better than issue 3. . .as long as you don't stop to think about motivations, plot holes, and the doubtful outcome of 1985 proto-Terminators defeating Skynet's best. . .and just enjoy page after page of a bada$$ Terminator tearing $hit up.

So for awesome Terminator battle action, it's great. Storywise. . .it's turning into a mess.

ISSUE FIVE

Former CIA Agent Greene and The Terminator are captured by the government, but manage to gain their freedom. Greene breaks her agreement with the Terminator and escapes with Dr. Fong, but the Skynet killing machine is in close pursuit. . . 

In the lead up to the final issue, things remain action-heavy as Greene and The Terminator escape the government compound with Dr. Fong after fighting their way past a room full of proto-Terminators.

While she's knocked out, Greene has a flashback of the assignment that put her on the government's $hit list. . .she accidentally caused the death of another agent and outed a Soviet double agent at the same time. . .that was pretty interesting. But that's about all the story beats to be found in this issue.

For some reason, the art takes a turn for the worse in this issue, with some truly horrendous panels, especially Greene's face. The flashback scene is nicely done, but for some reason it looks almost like two artists were working on this issue. . .

What happens when an artist stops caring. . .

Besides the bad art, the continuing problem of the main character being an unrelatable superwoman doesn't fail to make an appearance in this issue, with Greene adding escape artist and pilot to her ability list and a laughable scene of her catching a hand grenade in mid-air and chucking it back where it came from.

Overall, this series has been on a downward slide since the third issue, and this issue is one of the worst. The art is bad to the point of distraction in places and Greene's superhuman abilities are getting more and more ridiculous.

AND FINALLY. . .

ISSUE SIX

After escaping with Dr. Fong, Greene returns to battle with the Terminator one last time. . . 

Oh, hell no.

This series has been flirting with disaster since the 3rd issue, but this final issue finally sends it flying off the rails and over the cliff.

The main character being an unrelatable superhuman Mary Sue throughout this series comes to a laughable climax as she survives a midair head on collision with a jet. . .

What? THAT? Pff. . .walk it off.

. . .And then adds skydiving and hot wiring cars to her plot-convenient ability list before topping it all off by quoting Robert Frost and firing multiple shots from a bolt action rifle. . .

BUT. . .

Former CIA Agent turned Bounty Hunter Greene Mary Suing her way through the finale is NOTHING compared to the final fate of Dr. MacGuffin Fong as she rams the Terminator with a car, only for it to reach through the windshield and gently tap her heart, rupturing her pericardium and giving her a heart attack. . .complete with gasping monologue about how her kidnapper (Mary Sue Greene) is really a good person inside.

TERMINATORS DON'T "TAP" YOUR CHEST TO KILL YOU WITH A HEART ATTACK! THEY TEAR YOUR GODDAMN CHEST OPEN WITH THEIR COLD AND UNCARING ROBOTIC HANDS AND RIP YOUR HEART OUT! TERMINATORS DESTROY. . .THEY DON'T "TAP".

Screw this ending. Just. . .Screw it sideways.

CONCLUSION

I love the Terminator franchise.  Unfortunately, there's not much to love in this mini. 

It's not all bad.  The art is pretty good until later on in issues 5 and 6 when you can plainly see the artist stop giving a damn.  The concept is interesting.  There are some awesome scenes of the Terminator in full out battle with government troops.

BUT. . .

There's also a diversity checkbox unrelatable superwoman main character with a plot-convenient skillset that expands with every issue.  There are obvious plot holes around both the main character and the Terminator's motivations and actions.  The ending is EXTREMELY weak.

Overall, if you're just looking for some great battle action with a Terminator and a bada$$ human teaming up, then this mini is good for that.  If you're looking for a great Terminator story. . .not so good.  This is a good example of Longbox Junk at its best AND worst.

Up Next. . .

He's stranded on an unforgiving, alien world without weapons or armor. Captured and enslaved.

All is as Doom wishes it to be!

It's the mini that answers the question you never knew you wanted to ask. . .
"What would a Doctor Doom/ Road Warrior crossover be like?"

Marvel's 3 issue "Doom" mini. 

Be there or be square!

Longbox Junk - One Shots

Anyone who's been reading this blog for a while knows I have a love for the one shot.  If you're new, now you know. . .and thanks for reading!  One shots are tasty little bites of comic book tapas where the creative team has one and only one issue to impress the diner.  You never know what you're going to get with a one shot. Sometimes they hit it out of the park, other times it's a foul ball.

Wait. . .how did I go from food comparisons to baseball?

ANYWAY. . .

One shots! Let's do this!

FANTASTIC FOUR SPECIAL

Marvel (2006)

SCRIPT: Dwayne McDuffie

PENCILS: Casey Jones

COVER: Leinil Wu

While Reed Richards and Doctor Doom have dinner together, the rest of the Fantastic Four, along with Captain America and Spider-Man, fight Doombots in search of a unique component Doom needs to open a portal to another world that Richards has kept hidden since he and Doom were college roommates. 

I'm not a big Fantastic Four fan, but this one shot was pretty damn good! The ending in particular was very nicely done, as Richards returns the item Doom has been searching for willingly. It's a very sentimental moment between mortal enemies. The whole comic is very well written and surprisingly engaging. . .especially for someone who isn't a real fan of "traditional" superheroics like myself.

The art isn't anything spectacular. It's very nicely done in a clean, dynamic, cartoony way. The opening few pages (set during Doom and Richard's college years) could have been ripped straight from a Silver Age comic. 

Overall, this was a surprisingly good one shot with a great story and nicely done art. 

MOON KNIGHT: SILENT KNIGHT

Marvel (2009)

SCRIPT: Peter Milligan

PENCILS: Laurence Campbell

COVER: Clayton Crain

Moon Knight spends Christmas Night tracking down and punishing a group of thugs who killed a store Santa in cold blood. In the meantime his lover, Marlene, waits for him over a cold Christmas turkey.

I liked this one shot quite a bit. Milligan digs deep into both Marc Spector and Marlene. Both of them want normal lives, but both of them also realize that they sort of get off on the dirty, brutal life of being a street-level superhero and loving one. 

It's a really dark look at a "you can't have your cake and eat it too" situation where they feed into each other's insanity in a vicious circle of trying to change someone, but not REALLY wanting them to change.

The art on this one is as dark and gritty as the story and is a perfect fit for this grim little tale.

Overall, very well done all around.

HIGHLANDER #0

Dynamite (2006)

SCRIPT: Brandon Jerwa & Michael Avon Oeming

PENCILS: Lee Moder

COVER: Gabriele Dell'Otto

In 1986 The immortal Highlander Connor McCleod is once again dragged from his peaceful life when followers of the defeated Kurgan start to cause havoc in Paris and Russia.

This very short one shot serves as an introduction to Dynamite's ongoing Highlander series. It's heavily tied to the first movie (while at the same time sort of ignoring it), so anyone who hasn't seen it or doesn't remember it will be lost because this story just jumps right in without any background on who, what, or why.

The art is decent, but completely unsuited for this sort of book. McCleod looks NOTHING like his movie counterpart and the bright coloring and exaggerated features belong more in a superhero comic than one about immortals hiding in the shadows.

An extremely weak and short story tied into a movie on one end and an ongoing series on the other with an unsuitable art style make this one shot worth every penny of the .25 price tag. . .but not one cent more. 

SGT. FURY & HIS HOWLING COMMANDOS

Marvel (2009)

SCRIPT: Jesse Alexander

PENCILS: John Paul Leon

COVER: John Paul Leon

Sgt. Nick Fury and his Howling Commandos go to Nazi-occupied Yugoslavia on a secret recon mission and find themselves teaming up with a Soviet Black Widow to infiltrate a base where Baron Zemo is building a Nazi nuclear weapon. 

After destroying the weapon and failing to escape, the Howling Commandos and Black Widow are taken prisoner and taken to ANOTHER secret base, where they pretty much punch to death a giant robot built by Baron Strucker. All in all. . .business as usual for Nick Fury and The Howling Commandos. 

I found this 2009 one shot to be a lot of fun. The story is pretty ridiculous. . .especially parts where Fury jumps from tank to tank with the help of an umbrella, and the ending where the Howlers basically punch a giant robot to pieces. . .but there were also a lot of moments that were nothing but good, goofy throwback war comic fun.

The art on this one shot is fantastic from cover to last page, with a gritty, dark tone. A double-page spread introducing the Howling Commandos is a real standout in a book full of great panels. The depiction of the WWII Black Widow was also fantastic. The art isn't a perfect match for the light silver age throwback tone of the story, but it's impressive on its own.

Overall, a fun story with great art makes this one shot a winner!

THE TERMINATOR:

TERMINATION SPECIAL

Dark Horse (1998)

SCRIPT: Alan Grant

PENCILS: Guy Davis

COVER: Geof Darrow

Skynet discovers new information on John Connor's childhood and sends 2 Terminators back in time to a Satanic cult's Death Valley hideout.

This one shot serves as an introduction to Terminator D-810X, a female Terminator that is the main villain in the following 4 issue Dark Horse Terminator mini.

The story itself is pretty light. Skynet discovers information and sends Terminators back in time to investigate. Terminators completely eliminate Satanic cult. There's a bit of a side story about a private detective tracking down a girl who joined the cult, but both he an the girl are killed, so it's a bit pointless. It's not a BAD story, it's just extremely light.

The art is a bit uneven on this one. Machinery and tech, including Terminators, are very nicely done. The introductory 3 page battle against a Skynet tank in the future is a real feast for the eyes with all the detail. Unfortunately, the artist isn't so great with humans, so the art is a bit of a mixed bag, swerving from fantastic to borderline bad.

Overall, this one shot is pretty forgettable and since it's tied in with another series, I wouldn't suggest it to anyone but Terminator completionists.

And last, but not least. . .

SWAMP THING (vol. 2) ANNUAL #1

DC (1982)

SCRIPT: Bruce Jones & Wes Craven

PENCILS: Mark Texeira

COVER: Richard Hescox

Scientist Alec Holland discovers a way to combine plant and animal DNA and is killed by a wealthy man wanting the secret for himself. A woman survives the attack and manages to escape with a vital piece of Holland's research. As mercenaries hunt her through the swamp, they are hunted in turn by the creature Alec Holland has become. . .The Swamp Thing! 

This fairly hefty one shot is the adaptation of the original Swamp Thing movie. . .which I've seen, but barely remember anything but Adrienne Boobeau swimming topless in the swamp.

ANYWAY. . .

The story is pretty much one long chase scene. Nothing is really explained and beyond names, the comic book mythology is pretty much ignored in favor of all-out action. I understand that this is an adaptation of a script and a movie has to tell a story in an exact amount of time, but they COULD have expanded on things a little bit in written form. I'll be honest here and say that based on this comic, I don't really want to re-watch the movie. The ending battle with Arcane in final boss form is a particular stinker.

The art on this one is pretty good, as far as pencils and inks go. The coloring is garish and pretty sloppy in places. This probably would have looked a lot better as a black and white book. The painted cover (of the movie poster) is fantastic, showing off Ms. Boobeau's best movie starlet assets very nicely. . .and Swamp Thing looks cool too.

Overall, good art in service to a flimsy story makes this a pretty average effort. I wouldn't really suggest this to anyone but curiosity seekers.

CONCLUSION

All in all, not a bad bunch of one shots.  Only a couple of clunkers among them.  I'd say my favorite was probably Sgt. Fury. . .just because I love the old war comics and it was pretty much a Silver Age story told with modern art.  A close second was the surprisingly good Fantastic Four Special because I'm not even a fan of the FF and it hooked me in.

On the other end of things, I'd have to say that Highlander was the real stinker of the bunch.  It had an extremely thin story and art that was a definite mismatch for the subject.  Second worst would probably have to be Terminator. . .a damn shame since I'm a huge Terminator fan, but there just wasn't that much to it beyond some bits of nice art.

Up next. . .

MORE one shots, son!

Fantastic Four, Captain America, Lobo, Darkseid, Suicide Squad, and Soviet Super Soldiers.

Be there or be square!